Morman invents Mormon Porn (Barstool NYC)

Candice Swanepoel decided to play dress up and pass out boners left and right. Hide yo kids, hide yo wife. (CoedMagazine)

Floyd Mayweather is a great boxer and maybe a better racist. Man oh Manny. (Guyism)

Guy is selling his entire Wheaties box collection 2,750. About 2,749 more than anyone will ever need. (BustedCoverage)

Michael Bay is putting a 50k bounty on the Bosnian puppy thrower, likely will work an explosion into that bounty in some way. (ScreenJunkies)

Landing a Harrier Jet with no landing gear doesn’t seem so bad. Dude must’ve had a wicked killstreak going to score a mattress harrier. (TheChive)

Double Rainbow guy got a Windows Live commercial but still has the dirtiest taint this side of the Mississippi. (Stoollala)

Multiple recreations of the Office Space printer destruction scene. You can jump…to the link..here. (Buzzfeed)

Introducing Kate from SNHU.   Now this is what I’m talking about.  Yesterday I said I was kind of disappointed with the effort that Manchester and Providence had been putting forth with Back To Stool.    Well as a result we got a boat load of blazers from SNHU.     About fucking time.       I’m telling you we are going to blow up Manchester or die trying.   Tailgate all day.   Concert shitshow at night.   Party afterwards.   Book it.

Oh and the Back To Stool roadshow which is essentially a month of partying straight at Umass, Providence and Manchester begins Saturday as we head down to Amherst to tailgate for their opening game.    Come find us.  And  if you want to party with the Stool or if you’re a group of girls who want free VIP tickets and want to promote the shit out of these concerts at your school  contact paul@barstoolsports.com.    It’s time to open a can of whoop ass on New England.

Umass  Sept 25  (Buy Tickets )   200 Floor Seats Left

Paul Markham
The White Panda
Mac Miller
Wale
Mike Posner

Manchester Oct 7th (Buy Tickets)

Stephen Jerzak
2AM Club
Bad Rabbits
The White Panda
Mac Miller
Chiddy Bang
Mike Posner

Providence  Oct 9th (Buy Tickets)

Stephen Jerzak
2AM Club
Bad Rabbits
The White Panda
Mac Miller
Chiddy Bang
Mike Posner

Day 2 of the best lingerie contest in Boston.  As a reminder ladies if you don’t want to show your face that’s fine, but we need proof it’s you in the picture. It can be ass shot, tits shot, profile shot, I LOVE El Pres shot. Whatever. Let your imagination run wild. The highest ranked girl of each week will win a 100 gift certificate UndercoverWear. And the grand prize winner (girl with the highest score for the month) will win a $500 shopping spree , hair, makeup at the photo shoot, and featured in the UndercoverWear catalog, website, and publications for the season. UndercoverWear will also create a “comp card” for the girls to use for future modeling opportunities if they want it.

So ladies send your best lingerie shots to body@barstoolsports.com and let the lingerie madness begin!

(129 votes, average: 8.64 out of 10)

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That’s right ladies and gentleman. The 2010 college football season kicks off tonight and that means only one thing of course. El Pres and the best college football picks in the country are back! Just as a quick refresher course  for those of you who may be new to the Stool.  This is how Barstool started. None of the girls, none of the pictures of my face, none of the funny stories. It was just me giving out gambling picks and making people rich. It’s what I do. And while times may have changed my love and knowledge of college football has not. Nobody has watched more college football than me over the past two decades. Nobody. As a result I know what’s going to happen before it even happens and luckily for you I run a blog where you can read my brilliance for free and make yourself rich in the process. All I ask is you buy a ticket to Back To Stool to say thank you. So without further ado…here we go!

Pittsburgh at Utah – 3

It just couldn’t start off any easier than this. Pittsburgh is ranked 15th in the country which is very good for them. Everybody is expecting them to win the Big East. And while most coaches would be telling their players not to read their press clippings Dave Wannstedt strikes me as the type of guy who is bringing in the magazines into the locker room for everybody to read.   There is just no way they will be ready for this game. Utah is one of the hardest places to play in the country. They always feel like they have a chip on their shoulder and the place should be bonkers.  Pittsburgh probably thinks they can just show up and win and as a result will get embarrassed.

The Pick Utah – 3

Southern Miss at South Carolina -14

Listen Dustin Almond isn’t walking through that door. And if he did he’d be old and grey. Seriously not sure how an SEC team is only a two TD favorite at home vs. a Conference USA team. I feel like a say the same shit every year about this game because South Carolina always plays the first game of the year at home. Granted the opponent is different but the results are always the same. Southern Miss will not score a TD. It may be close at half but by the time it’s over South Carolina will be up by 4 TD’s. That’s not a guess. That’s a fact.

The Pick – SC -14

So there you have it. Two stone cold winners for the first night of college football. Oh and if you don’t have a book yet Bet US is the official sportsbook of the Stool this year so at least you know you’re money is safe and it’s legit.

NESN – If Shaquille O’Neal wants to crash your wedding, he’s going to crash your wedding. On Friday, Aug. 27, that’s just what happened as Shaq wandered into the wedding ceremony of Kristen and Wes Schifone at the Four Seasons in downtown Boston, much to the delight of the newly-weds. Shaq didn’t show off his epic moves on the dance floor, nor did he spit out some serious rhymes with the band, but it was a memorable visit to say the least. “Considering it was someone of his stature, he was a total gentleman and just acted like one of the guys,” the groom said from his Hawaiian honeymoon. “He accepted everyone’s photo request and even remembered our names the next day and asked that we come down for a photo shoot with him for the [Boston] Globe.”

To be honest I don’t really get this story. Shaq just walked into a private wedding? Dressed in a tshirt? I’d be kind of pissed if I were the groom. Like this is my day bro. Stop stealing my shine. Or at least put on a tie or something. It’s the fucking Four Seasons for God Sakes. And yeah he was a total gentleman except for the fact his snake is almost wrapped around your wife’s ass in this picture. Cmon I can’t be the only who noticed that.  I mean that is his hog right?

Reader Email

El Prez,

I know you caught tons of shit for your post about your hair a while back. I knew what you were talking about. I’ve been using the same “bed head” hair wax for almost 10 years and I am 25. Anyway, I got my hair cut the other day and they put this miracle shit in my hair. Paul Mitchell Tea Tree Shaping Cream. You have to try it, it gives you the surfer/ rockstar hair you were describing.

No Homo,

Dave

No homo at all bro.   I’ll fucking give this shit a whirl because I’m kind of like you.    I’ve been using this Queen Helena stuff since I was in middle school.     To be honest I think it’s geared towards African American women but somehow it ended up in my house when I was like 12 and I’m the type of guy who is very resistant to change so I just started using it and never turned back.   It’s pretty hard to find too.    Brooks Pharmacy is just about the only place that carries it.    Long story short I was thinking it was time for a change and if you’re telling me this Mitchell Tea Tree Shaping Cream is going to give me surfer hair then I’m fucking ready to make the switch.    Enough of the flourcent red and yellow Queen Helena bullshit.     Chicks better watch their panties because El Pres surfer hair may be here to stay.