Foxnews - Boys and girls at a Massachusetts elementary school have been banned from bringing Valentine’s Day candy or cards over cultural equality issues and federal guidelines regulating candy. Parents of students at Salemwood Elementary School in Malden, Mass, received a letter informing them of the policy – that impacts not just Valentine’s Day – but all holidays.“We have many different nationalities, cultures and languages spoken,” Principal Carol Keenan told Fox News. “Because of that we don’t honor specific holidays.”Keenan said she did not want some students feeling left out.“This is done with all good intentions – to have all students be accepted, to have all students feel like they belong,” she said. Keenan said they were not cancelling Valentine’s Day. Instead, the elementary school is going to celebrate a modified version.“Every student is making a friendship card for another student,” she said. “I wanted to make sure that every single student is given the opportunity to get a card and to also give a card. I didn’t want some students feeling left out.” She said she decided to send the letter after parents made inquiries about sending birthday balloons and birthday cakes to school.“We just don’t do that because we want equity for all,” Kennan said. Parents and local residents said they are furious at the decision.

You know what the most disheartening part of this story is?  Not that they banned Valentine’s Day.  It’s the fact that this doesn’t even remotely surprise me. Not in the least. I didn’t even blink when I read it. Like of course Malden Elementary School cancelled Valentines Day so kids wouldn’t feel left out. This just what happens now. Teachers, principals and school administrators have one goal in life now. Not to teach kids. Not to make kids think for themselves. Nope. It’s just to make sure that everybody thinks they are exactly the same. To teach them that there are no winners and losers in life. That everybody gets everything they want all the time. If Joey gets a good job you get a good job. If Joey dates a pretty girl you date a pretty girl. Equity for all really means everybody should be treated like they are identical humans. That’s the goal. No competition. No Valentines Day cards to the cutie you got a crush on because it’s unfair to the girl you don’t have a crush on.

You know what I did when I didn’t get a Valentines Day card from any of the smokes in my 3rd grade class?  I didn’t cry about it.  Well I probably did, but then I figured out it was because I had a huge nose and I better be good at something else or I was fucked.  So I became hilarious.  Now look at me.   I’m a blogging mogul.  All because I wasn’t tricked into thinking I could slide by on just being me. Thank Christ I’m not 8 years old nowadays.  I’d be fucked.

PS – In all seriousness what happens when this generation of pussies graduate from college? I think we’re already seeing it with feminists and Occupy movement and these other groups who expect handouts for just existing. And it’s just going to keep getting worse. It’s actually really scary. Our schools act like we live in a socialist country. Bizarre.