So the First Lady left to go to Germany for a week today.    She woke me up at 6am this morning with the following exchange:


First Lady: Dave there was a note under our door this morning.

Me: What did it say?

First Lady: It said there was a giant dildo on our front door and there was.

Me: Huh?

First Lady: There was a giant dildo on our door.  I think we have to move.

Me: What time is it?

And that’s how my day got underway today.  With my wife waking me up at the crack of ass to tell me there was a giant dildo attached to our front door.  Naturally she’s pretty rattled.   Wants to move and shit.  I don’t blame her.    Me I don’t want to think.   Could be a joke.   Could be a lunatic.   Could be Ordway.    Could be Cheeseboy.   White Boy blogger problems at it’s finest I guess.   Seriously who put this dick on my door?



PS – Mom and Dad I have nothing to add to this story.  I have not dusted the dildo for finger prints.   It happened exactly as I just said it.

Double PS – Since when do dildo’s come with balls?   Has that always been the case?