High School Kid Gets A Prom Date With A Smokeshow Texans Cheerleader Because He Made A YouTube Video. I’m So Sick Of These Kids

 

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Houston Texans Cheerleaders

 

 

Godddd dammit! I’m so sick of these YouTube videos. The first one was cute and funny, I think it was someone asking Justin Timberlake to a Military Ball. But after that? I’m tired of it. This is cheating. These kids just fire out countless YouTube vids to celebrities or professional hot people and end up with the best prom date in history. That’s not how it’s supposed to work. They skip the part where you’ve got a pit in your stomach for a week trying to work up the courage to ask the hot girl. They skip the part where she turns you down in the dining hall, in front of everyone. They skip the part where you go to prom with the ugly girl and spend the whole time jealous of everyone else. Those are character building situations. Situations that make you a stronger man and urge you to become better at life. Just making a YouTube and blindly tweeting it out doesn’t take an ounce of courage. Who wants to go to prom with the kid who’s scared to ask a girl out face to face? It’s just a pity date, and unlike most prom pity dates this one probably doesn’t even end with a drunken handjob.

 

 

PS – That’s not even a regular NFL cheerleader. She has to be one of the hottest in the league.

 

 

PPS – This only works as a guy asking a girl, right? Like if a 30 year old man goes to prom with a high school chick it’s really creepy and not cute, right?

 

 

UPDATE: Kmarko just pointed out to me that Caitlyn is one of his smokeshows. Of course she is.

By feitelberg posted March 3rd, 2014 at 10:07 AM

Wkae Up With Christen Dye

 

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By feitelberg posted November 15th, 2013 at 9:00 AM

Does This Look Like The Face Of A Man Who Had Sex With His Unconscious Neighbor In Order To Save Her Life?

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(Salt Lake)A 50-year-old St. George man is in trouble after he allegedly found a female neighbor unconscious on her front porch and allegedly claimed he had sex with her to try to warm her. Rodger William Kelly told police he inserted his penis inside the unconscious 29-year-old on May 19 because “he was trying to save her life,” according to court documents.”He said he did place it inside of her to try and get her temperature up,” police wrote in a probable cause statement filed in 5th District Court. Police told Kelly that his actions amounted to rape. He was charged Monday with one count of first-degree felony rape. Kelly told officers that he found the woman passed out in front of her apartment and brought her inside his apartment, changed her clothes and put her on his bed. He said he then lay down next to her and hugged her to try to get her temperature up because she had been outside, then attempted intercourse to warm her.

 

Here’s the deal: I’m not condoning fucking unconscious chicks. Not by a long shot. 999 times out of a 1000 that is the wrong move. But, this chick is alive. The story isn’t about the police finding a dead girl on her front porch. It’s about a neighbor saving a girl’s life. Sure, maybe the sex was unnecessary. Maybe he could have found other, more orthodox ways to warm up a human body. But the point is that it worked, isn’t it? Sometimes it’s not so much about how a job got done, but just that it got done.

By feitelberg posted June 11th, 2013 at 11:15 AM

I Have A New Type And It’s “Kiteboarder”

hot new twins from Naish Kiteboarding on Vimeo.

 

Just googled “kiteboarding phrases.” Top result was “If it doesn’t blow, it sucks!”

 

I’ll take either.

 

 h/t @Diesel_Kiki

By feitelberg posted May 11th, 2013 at 12:00 PM

Tuesday Throwback: Wake Up With Karen McDougal

Any former playmate of the year who has fucked John McClane deserves her own wake up gallery.

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By feitelberg posted December 4th, 2012 at 9:00 AM

Tuesday Throwback – Wake Up With Stephanie Seymour

When you’re 44 and still bring such heat that you give your son a boner on the beach, you know you’re wake up worthy.

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By feitelberg posted October 16th, 2012 at 9:00 AM

Tuesday Throwback – Wake Up With Carmen Electra

Hotel internet has been fucking me a bit so here’s a bigger gallery than usual. Two words to describe this girl: D. Licious.

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By feitelberg posted October 2nd, 2012 at 9:00 AM

Tuesday Throwback – Wake Up With Tyra Banks

If you grew up in the 90′s Tyra Banks is the first black girl you ever fell in love with. Fact.

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By feitelberg posted September 4th, 2012 at 9:00 AM
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