I Want The Best Writers In the Country And I Don’t Give A Fuck Where They Come From
Ok I’m sick of waiting for a Chicago writer to present himself. I’m ready to hire more writers with or without Chicago. I want the best of the fucking best. I want to turn this joint into the Top Gun of blogs. If you’re not in the top 1% of 1% get out of my face. These are obviously paid gigs. Real fucking life changing shit. I don’t know how many writers I’m going to hire. 1,3,5 or what? I haven’t found anybody that has blown me away in years. I don’t care if you already have a writing gig. I’ll beat it. It’s time to take this shit next level on people.
So if you’re interested in writing about dumb shit and partying with hot girls send us a sample blog link. Do not send resumes because I don’t give a shit. All I care about is whether I think you’re a good blogger. That’s it. The only way for me to tell is by reading a current blog of yours. Not one entry. If you don’t already have an existing blog than set up a sample one and keep it updated for a day and send me the link. If you send me it I promise you I’ll read it. I can’t reply to everybody who applies but trust me if you’re what I’m looking for I will get back to you. Otherwise I appreciate the interest. Oh and if you’re over 30 don’t bother. We’re trying to get younger not Jerryier.
Send all blog links to writers@barstoolsports.com
interesting…
Judging by the video, you’re looking for a couple writers who will hook up with an ugly chick and have palpable sexual tension with the other writers?
what percent is fightelberg in?
It’s “then”, not “than”.
So, really, all we would have to do is be funnier than Scott, right?
Wonder what blackdude would have to say about this
If all I have to do is be funnier than Scott, Osgood and Maurice you might as well hire me now. Actually, 97% of the comment section stoolies are funnier than Maurice.
I was reading, and thinking to myself nice, fucking nice, sweet, I can’t wait to get started and maybe branch this out to the west coast, then fuck knife to the heart when I saw that I am considered a Jerry. Best of luck to whoever enters!
How young? Most middle school students can write better than Portnoy.
Jerrier? How about Portnoy-er, you fucking fossil. You’re half as hip as you think you are, grandpa simpson.
are you just trying to set the “daily grind sports” guys up for embarrassment once they ditch their shitty blog and beg you to let them join the cool kids blog? i think so, i think so!
I think its high time barstool extended into canada, im confident it would be met with the same type of enthusiasm as tom cruises fist pump too the fighter taking off.
“Jerryier”? Shit, I get more pussy than you ever dreamed of…. I don’t need to write about it, but I will for the right price. Thanks for the age discrimination suit though… I appreciate the opportunity to retire really early….
haleyingonmyface … thanks for your click! why the hate for Daily Grind Sports
“younger not Jerryier” is gold
Because daily grind sports sucks big dick
Mav got Goose killed. Guy was fuckin dangerous up there
Damn Portnoy, that hurts bro. Nobody over 30? Fuck that, im gna do it just becuz u said i cant.
hey pres, I’m interested, message me and we’ll talk
So you’re a Jerry…eh?
I suppose im a jerry, dude.
someone’s ears perked up with The Big Lead news!!!
Too bad I’m more Jerrier than Jerry is.
So you want young bloggers who can appeal to what the 15 year olds? You want your buisness to expand but expand to a limited audience.
it does aight…you both could qualify as dingleberries.
you both could qualify as dingleberries …
Fuuuck Chicago Pres, you need to break out Barstool Pittsburgh…Not only do we have the Penguins, we have the Pittsburgh Power- an absolute AFL powerhouse, the Pittsburgh Passion-one of the fiercest professional womens football teams in the tri state area, and the fuckin Pirates bro-enough said…also there are the steelers but they are a bunch of queers…plus we cant spell very good so we would fit right in. Only catch is I refuse to be interviewed, assessed or judged by you, either give me the job or you can go right on and fuck yourself. Viva La Stool
Chi till i die i dont blog but im going to get into to it and when i do ima dick slap some fools.
lol
I would be your best/most hilarious/most popular blogger in 3 days. But, I have other, long-term career plans. Good luck.
literally the funniest thing I’ve heard on this website aside from any comment supplied by daily grind sports
you want the 1% of the 1%? they’re already working with sites that are actually recognized. you know, the ones that you’ve been trying to copy since the dawn of time..
We don’t need you in Chicago, thanks
http://happyendingz.blogspot.com/
Boom, you have a new chick blogger.
i like when preisdent blogs with bosotn but jews to much. make more funny but too many bros and slater gonna slate your coffee spit takes. just funny get fucked
I could legitimately do a better job than half of your staff, but my actual job only allows me enough time to comment on the occasional blog. Unless KFC is raking in about 10x as much as I envision he does, I’m not sure I could explain that change of career to my girlfriend/family/friends/anyone.
Dynamite Flynt does it again! God i love this dude. Pure genius. Theres your guy, Prez!!!
“i like when preisdent blogs with bosotn but jews to much. make more funny but too many bros and slater gonna slate your coffee spit takes. just funny get fucked”
Possibly the best thing I’ve read in months on this site.
Please god tell me this means Scott is finally getting fired.
agreed, why not play off the bad grammar and hire a foreigner learning the english that thinks you’re funny and will do anything for a job
fuck you and fuck your face
Seriously, who the fuck is this Scott person everyone is talking about?
I am also looking to hire a couple of stoolies willing to go down to Penn State & dig up Joe Pa’s corpse. You have to leave Joe Pa’s body on Sandusky’s lawn with his pants down around his ankles & pour ketchup in the crack of his ass. Too soon?
how about writing about sports down here in the south instead of your yankee jew bag bullshit with your shitty trance dance parties
I have to tell you, “bloggers” aren’t working for you. Just hire a good fucking creative writer would you? Who cares how old. I was sold on Bar Stool Sports a few years ago but it is in a horrible decline. Boston, NY, Philly all have the same posts. Why the diffenet links? It doesn’t matter you have the same shit on all three. It really has become corn in shit. El Pres has become Bob Sagat, posting repeat videos. I clearly am no writer but I will find you one here in Chicago after and only after you do the same in Boston, Philly and New York. Clean your house up shit whistle, you are losing credibility daily. For the love of God do not get Bstool Chicago going until you fix your current train wreck. Viva la Bar Tool! Fix it!
people are hating on pres but still have time to read barstool and comment…kinda funny.
does being able to suck my own dick give me an advantage?
Agree with the Pittsburgh guy.
P.S- why not relocate kmarko? Dude’s got talent and 0 readers
Is it a requirement to be a douschebag frat boy or merely a suggestion?
You got some blackout tour money burning a hole in your pocket? Let me know when you fire the sales guy, I’ll show you how to sell shit.
Too bad about not wanting to get more “Jerrier”, RA and him are the only real talent you have blogging about sports. Yes, I’m old and angry.
You could start getting younger by stopping with the double space after every period. Only people using typewriters do that.
It’s not double-spaced, it’s triple-spaced you moof, and only people born after 1995 single space. Look it up on your twitter.
I’m a lawyer at skadden arps. I’m gonna sue your ass for age discrimination. I really might….it’s been tough to hit our billable hours for a bonus this year
really masshole? shouldn’t you be working 80 hrs a week somewhere?
Ummmmmmmm If anyone over thirty is even reading this blog, they need to grow up/get a life.
Dynamite Flynt ftw
You should grab some of the talent over at Into Bolivian. They’re loaded over there.
they switched from the Swingline to the Boston stapler, but I kept my Swingline stapler because it didn’t bind up as much, and I kept the staples for the Swingline stapler and it’s not okay because if they take my stapler then I’ll set the building on fire…
Honestly didn’t know how many over 30 stoolies there are until they started whining on this blog. Then I thought about how I’ll probably still think jokes about shit and retards are funny when I’m 60. By the way, jerry, that was hilarious.
@black people- I’m 32 and read all the BSS sites daily, for your sake when you’re my age I hope you still have the same sense of humor when you hit 32 too, otherwise the rest of your life is going to be a fucking bore.
You’re really upsetting the Jerryatric crowd here.
brah, why you hating on the old people? half the shit you and some of the other pools of mediocrity you have on the payroll who “fit the age bill” can’t even produce shit to make half my nut giggle. I think before you start expanding this visual toilet paper you might want to clean up the home front. Don’t limit your talent … and by YOUR I mean what you are going to hire.
^You old bro?
I say you LET THE READERS PICK! Give us like 5 finalists and let the people vote who they think is the best. Barstool Idol!
love seeing the “i could easily do this but have a real job” comments. you wont do it pussies
Live update on Barstool’s search for a new blogger:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g4OBUupicWg&feature=related
i could easily do this but have a real job
mad broseph, you’re a genius. That’s the point, we won’t do it. On account of having a real job.
Looking for the best writers in America?
Really? This coming from a douche-tub who spells cat, katt?
Nice job alienating half of your readership. Maybe you could post a picture of Gronkowski’s nephew’s dick and simply get this site shut down for good?
How can you not pick dynamite flint? He has been the best commenter for the last month.
Hi, I’m Dynamite Flint. Fuck yer ass dont touch me Im not a homo but you be if you are and here s another thing in my town we have this thing called a fucky ou too becuz we dont mess with people like dat. you dig? ima outta here. hire me prez you no I am the best commentedator out here rite?
I get ageism with broads. How old are you again ep? You fucking hypocrite. Not to mention in this case you’re a fucking idiot. It’s no wonder the only writer people give any shit about on this site is you. And you’re 35! The rest of the hacks, especially feetlejuice and the other amateurs would be unemployed if they tried to get jobs as writers. Fuck you ep. Under 30, eat a dick you fucking piece of shit. Hope the vagiants beat the piss out of the patriots again so you can cry in your sleep like you deserve.
honestly you need to get a legit black dude to start Barstool Oakland… shit would be unreal
JoeSTAT will answer the call !!!
Masshole transplant holding it down in LA
game on…
http://rhodetoboston.blogspot.com/
Holy shit… To the Pittsburgh Fanboys- Go fuck yourselves. God hates Pittsburgh The corollary of which means he hates you too. Fucking french fries on your sandwiches. Disgusting. Pittsburgh is what America would be like if the German’s won the war… With higher rates of obesity and heart conditions. The only thing dryer than your dying, forgotten town is the OLD pussy that’s apparently been hiding in the woodwork of this site. Bros- your past thirty, we’re just happy you found out how to use a computer before you died. Now fuck off. If you don’t like the building, it has exits on every level. We didnt make you old and this site is not the fountain of youth. So get those Granny Panties outta a bunch and take your Jerryatric asses over to the Early Bird Special. I hear Dennys is having a special AARP night.
My money says that anyone over the age of 60 would beat the living shit of fairy boy jacksc. Fuckin’ faggot.
Jacksc, that was good tho bro. Haha. Aint no shame in our game. Dont forget about the coleslaw on those sandwitches too bro. Its called a Pirmantti and it will make you spooge urself.
539.
Hey, masshole84, you aren’t a lawyer at Skadden (or at least not one with any background in employment litigation). If you were, you’d know that your discrimination suit would fail. Pres may stipulate an age limit because age is a “bona fide occupational qualification reasonably necessary to the normal operation of the particular business.” Nice try though — lying on the internet is really cool.
@elpresidente U talk like ur somebody important, ROFL. ur a nobody, ya mama sould’ve swallowed u. I’d like to see how tuff u are after i punch u in the mouth. Your blog aint worth a food stamp- complete garbage. REPLY IF U HAVE BALLZ
Wow ogre, you are the toughest of all the tough internet tough guys. Thats scary shit right there.
I feel like the comments are at an all-time high, and probably the traffic, no way BSS is on the decline. El Pres FTW
Interesting legal analysis bosox24. See you went with the “bona fide occupational qualification reasonably necessary to the normal operation of the particular business” approach there. Other slightly more prominent flaws with Masshole84′s post included:
1. No-one ever calls it Skadden Arps
2. Law firms don’t just initiate their own suits
3. No-one at Skadden is that illiterate
4. Skadden associates already got their bonuses
5. Skadden never finds it particularly hard to hit billable hours. The problem is usually people not working hard enough to rack up the hours.
http://www.lmwlostmyway.com
Enough said.
Dave Chappelle was 30 when he started his own show. The younger someone is, the less shit they’ve done, and their writing will be less interesting. It’s fucking simple, hire the best writers. I don’t give a shit who writes what. I’d rather read something funny from a dude who’s had a blog for years than some 22 year old with a “high ceiling” learning on the job.
Outdated as fuck. But good. http://groovedshoulder.wordpress.com/
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