(tight squeeze indeed)
PROVIDENCE, R.I. – An apparently inebriated 22-year-old woman was rescued early Friday morning after she became wedged between two buildings. Courtney A. Malloy, of Cheshire, Conn., was taken to Rhode Island Hospital after the hour-and-a-half rescue. It appeared that Malloy tried using the narrow alley between the City Sports and FedEx Kinko’s buildings, near Brown University, as a cut-through, said Acting Battalion Fire Chief Jeffrey Varone. But she got stuck in the 8- to 9-inch gap between the buildings, Varone said, and she was trapped, her body horizontal and about two feet off the ground. “It’s amazing she got herself in there, actually,” Varone added. Malloy appeared to be intoxicated, according to a police report, and although she had no visible injuries, she was taken to the hospital to be checked. For her part, Malloy was unable to explain how she ended up stuck between the buildings, the police said.
Thank Christ this chick is hot. Because the only thing more embarrassing than needing to be rescued because you got yourself wedged between two buildings is getting stuck because you’re fat. Then the jokes are really going to cut deep, but this girl is hot as hell. It goes from somebody kill that pig to gosh this girl is cute. That’s the difference between pretty and ugly in a nutshell. So yeah I’m sure she’s going to be pissed that this is on Barstool. And I’m sure she’s embarrassed right now. But honestly in the long run this is an awesome story that you can tell your grand-kids one day. Like if you told me this could have happened to me 2 years ago I’d make that trade in a second. It’ like when Peterman bought all Kramer’s stories. This is a great one to have in the bag. “Remember the time Courtney got stuck inbetween two buildings and needed to get pried out of there by the entire fire department? Those were the days!”