Bieber Just Dangled And Went Top Shelf Like You Read About

My dangles were unreal did u see that shot I'm number 20 #dontfuckwithecanadian #dangles #20 #younggretzky #iceicebaby #uthoughtthiswasagame #imadethatpuckmybitch #iknewistillhadit A video posted by Justin Bieber (@justinbieber) on Oct 10, 2014 at 8:44pm PDT     Dangle, dangle city bitch… #dontfuckwithecanadian #dangles #20 #younggretzky #iceicebaby #uthoughtthiswasagame #imadethatpuckmybitch #iknewistillhadit    (Biebers words not mine)   Live look [...]

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Dangle, dangle city bitch…

#dontfuckwithecanadian #dangles #20 #younggretzky #iceicebaby #uthoughtthiswasagame #imadethatpuckmybitch #iknewistillhadit    (Biebers words not mine)

 

Live look at me Selena right now…..

 

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PS – It sucks that Bieber was wearing a helmet because I guarentee you he was mean mugging the shit out of people after that sweet dangle.  Dangle, dangle city bitch.

By elpresidente posted October 22nd, 2014 at 10:46 AM

Can We Talk About How Stupid KFC Is For Saying Nonpariels Are Poor People Candy?

  Barstool NY – Hands down, far and away, the worst movie theater candy in the world. Its almost like Nestle has the movie theater industry by the balls and somehow forces them to carry these pieces of shit for sale. Like have you ever seen Sno Caps anywhere outside of the movie theater? Better [...]

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Barstool NYHands down, far and away, the worst movie theater candy in the world. Its almost like Nestle has the movie theater industry by the balls and somehow forces them to carry these pieces of shit for sale. Like have you ever seen Sno Caps anywhere outside of the movie theater? Better question…what the fuck is a NONPAREIL? These taste like pennies covered in bitter chocolate topped off with sidewalk rock salt.

 

 

So KFC wrote a blog yesterday about poor people Halloween candy. It was a decent list with one MAJOR fuckup. He somehow had snowcaps on there. AKA – Nonpareils.  I was getting ready to rip him a new asshole and then Hank went and chopped off his finger and I had to go to the hospital. But I just can’t let it slide. Umm newsflash KFC, nonpareils are like the rolls Royce of candy. I have no idea why they sell snowcaps at the movies, but that doesn’t change the fact they are fancy shit for fancy people. Poor people can’t pronounce Nonpareil nevermind eat them. I mean they sell them next to cashews and pistachios in stores. They get put into candy baskets next to chocolate pretzels. They live on the candy equivalent of Park Avenue. So don’t tell me Nonpariels are poor people shit. They are the exact opposite. They Finer Things Club through and through. Just shocking to put this on the list. Almost invalidated the entire thing. Surprised he didn’t have Rolos on there as well.

By elpresidente posted October 22nd, 2014 at 10:08 AM

Florida Man Arrested For Extreme Shopping aka Jerking Off In Front Of Chicks At The Mall

    SOURCE – Police say one shopper got his pants half-off.  A man accused of flashing women at a mall in Sanford, Florida last week allegedly told officers he was just “extreme shopping,” the Orlando Sentinel reports. Christopher Glaze, 27, was arrested on October 20 after two women reported that he had exposed himself [...]

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SOURCEPolice say one shopper got his pants half-off.  A man accused of flashing women at a mall in Sanford, Florida last week allegedly told officers he was just “extreme shopping,” the Orlando Sentinel reports. Christopher Glaze, 27, was arrested on October 20 after two women reported that he had exposed himself to each of them in separate incidents inside the mall. Glaze allegedly explained that “extreme shopping” was “when you go shopping and you talk to girls and flirt,” according to WKMG.  He was charged with two counts of indecent exposure of sexual organs.

 

Well I feel like a pussy. I always thought that extreme shopping was more like Supermarket Sweep or going to the mall at 4 a.m. on Black Friday or getting into a yelling match with the 7/11 owner by my apartment because he never has any goddam hot dogs on the rollers late night. Christopher Glaze just changed the game, though. Shopping and talking to girls and flirting? That shit is extreme as some late-90s era Doritos.

The flirting on its own can be nerve wracking enough, but if you’re trying to pull off this extreme shopping move you’ve probably got plenty of confidence. But malls? That’s stressful shit for anyone.  There’s a bunch of tweens running around, old people crushing laps, the beckoning cloud-like aroma of Auntie Anne’s hangs thick in the air like the fog of an Everglades dawn. And those are just exterior factors; you’ve also got the actual shopping.

You can’t walk around with nothing all day and make it obvious you’re just there to hit on girls, but you also don’t want to be carrying a thousand bags, so what do you get? Hit H&M and get something cheap and light? Go to Spencer’s Gifts and get something that could be a conversation piece? Maybe head to Brookstone or the Apple store and make it known you’ve got some cash to spend. There are a lot of things to keep track of mentally. You get one or two signals crossed and the next thing you know you’re pounding off in front of the Sephora just like Chris Glaze. Seen it a thousand times. @EricBarstool

By ericpops posted October 22nd, 2014 at 9:30 AM

Barstool Sports Instagram Hottest Halloween Costume Contest

  Because its our duty…Everyday on the Barstool Sports Instagram we are going to be counting down the hottest girls in the hottest costumes all the way through Halloween weekend. The girl we feature who has the most likes on November 2nd at 6PM will win $100 cash and be crowned “Barstool Sports Hottest Costume [...]

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Because its our duty…Everyday on the Barstool Sports Instagram we are going to be counting down the hottest girls in the hottest costumes all the way through Halloween weekend. The girl we feature who has the most likes on November 2nd at 6PM will win $100 cash and be crowned “Barstool Sports Hottest Costume of 2014″

Follow the Barstool Instagram and DM us any nominations @Barstool_Sports

By elpresidente posted October 21st, 2014 at 9:00 PM

Marlins Man Getting His Malibu’s Most Wanted On At the World Series

    Yeah I’ve read the story on Marlins Man.   I still don’t get anything about him.  How does he get this seat to the World Series?   Is he the richest man on the planet? Does he just live in KC year round now? And how can any human be this big of [...]

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Yeah I’ve read the story on Marlins Man.   I still don’t get anything about him.  How does he get this seat to the World Series?   Is he the richest man on the planet? Does he just live in KC year round now? And how can any human be this big of a Marlins fan?

 

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By elpresidente posted October 21st, 2014 at 8:53 PM

Barstool Rundown – October 21

Part 1 Part 2 Aftershow Addressing #Dronegate Podcast Topics 1. Get Ready For A Halloween Season Full Of Horrible People Wearing Ray Rice Costumes 2. Oregon Bros Just Playing Some Beer Pong In The Stands During The Washington Blowout  3. Pro Tip- If You Slap Somebody In The Face With A Piece Of Pizza Prepare To Get Punched [...]

Part 1

Part 2

Aftershow Addressing #Dronegate

Podcast

Topics

1. Get Ready For A Halloween Season Full Of Horrible People Wearing Ray Rice Costumes

2. Oregon Bros Just Playing Some Beer Pong In The Stands During The Washington Blowout 

3. Pro Tip- If You Slap Somebody In The Face With A Piece Of Pizza Prepare To Get Punched Harder Than You’ve Ever Been Punched Before

4. Jimbo Fisher Getting Heated With Media And Cutting Interview Short For Asking Him About Jameis Winston 

5. Losing Boxer Knocks Out Ref

6. Anybody Who Thinks The Royals Are Going To Win the World Series Is A Moron

By milmore posted October 21st, 2014 at 7:18 PM

Sad News: Stoolie Chris Lynch Passed Away Sunday Night After His Battle With Cancer

    From Chris’s GoFund Me Page   I am very sad to announce that as of Sunday, October 20th 1:10am, Chris has passed away. He was in full remission of the AML, but soon after a lung infection started, which was followed by blood poisoning. To quote this brother, Connor: “This will be one [...]

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From Chris’s GoFund Me Page

 

I am very sad to announce that as of Sunday, October 20th 1:10am, Chris has passed away. He was in full remission of the AML, but soon after a lung infection started, which was followed by blood poisoning.

To quote this brother, Connor:

“This will be one of the hardest things I’ll ever have to write. Today, at 1:10am, my older brother Christopher passed away. For the past month, he fought like a bastard against blood viruses and lung infections and all manner of health problems. He was with family and friends when he passed. He was 25.

There’s little I can say now that people don’t know about him. He fought viciously and beat leukemia. He waited until I was home from New York, of that I have no doubt. He stayed positive throughout the toughest fights. He was a Lynch, and stayed strong until the final hour.

Not a single person can dispute his fighting spirit and indomitable will. He will always and forever be a hero to me, and not a day will go by that I won’t miss him or love him.

Christopher Joseph Lynch
10/12/1989 – 10/20/2014″

We sincerely thank each and every person who put the Lynch family in their thoughts and prayers during this very sad time.

We will post details on the arrangements once we know more.

 

Just wanted to mention this real quick. Really sad news that Chris Lynch passed away on Sunday Night. We were lucky enough to get to meet Chris before he went in for his bone marrow transplant in March. We got to hang out for him for a couple hours at BSS World Headquarters and everything his brother wrote about him was dead on. Despite the fact he was dealt a shitty hand he was determined to battle as hard and as long as he could. Chris was me, you, everybody who reads the Stool.  Bottomline is stories like these just show why life is too short and too fragile to take so seriously. You just try to live it to the fullest each day and that’s exactly what Chris did. It was honestly an honor getting to meet him. Hopefully he’s in a better place now.

If you want to make a donation in his name there is a go fund me link set up. RIP.

By elpresidente posted October 21st, 2014 at 6:19 PM

Barstool Local Smokeshow of the Day – Cara from UCONN – Barstool Blackout Returns to Hartford and Worcester This Weekend!

  Introducing Cara from UCONN. It must be Blackout week in Hartford because the smokes keep coming out of the woodwork from Storrs.   Know any smokes who deserve free tickets to Hartford or Worcester this weekend? Email them to tips@barstoolsports.com   10/24 – Worcester – Palladium (BUY NOW) 10/25 – Hartford – Webster Theater (BUY NOW) [...]

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Introducing Cara from UCONN. It must be Blackout week in Hartford because the smokes keep coming out of the woodwork from Storrs.

 

Know any smokes who deserve free tickets to Hartford or Worcester this weekend? Email them to tips@barstoolsports.com

 

10/24 – Worcester – Palladium (BUY NOW)

10/25 – Hartford – Webster Theater (BUY NOW)

 

 

 

 

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By elpresidente posted October 21st, 2014 at 5:32 PM
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