Watching the Tennessee Titans play the Pats today in their throwback unis is going to be a sad reminder that some institutions in America simply aren’t as good as they once were. Because make no mistake, the Titans were a much, much cooler franchise back when they were the Houston Oilers. The Oilers might not have had the drama of coming up a yard shy of winning the Super Bowl on the last play or the panache that comes from having their best player shot dead by his insane mistress, but they had a style and class that the Titans will probably never have. For a team that never made it to a Super Bowl (two AFL championships, but who’s counting), they managed to establish some all time NFL superlatives that might never be bested:

Best Fight Song Ever:

“Houston Oilers #1″ captured the hearts of America in a way that pretenders like “San Diego Superchargers” and “Super Bowl Shuffle” could only dream of. And when it was accompanied by 80,000 powder blue pom poms in the Astrodome, it was awe inspiring.

Funniest Head Coach Ever

Bum Phillips was a classic. A drawling, colorful, cowboy hat-clad Texas quote machine who seemed to come out of central casting to play the part of Good Ol’ Boy Football Coach. He refused to wear his hat to home games because his mama taught him to take his hat off indoors. He summed up the life of a struggling coach with the phrase “You don’t know a ladder has splinters until you’re sliding down it.” Bob Costas once asked him why he always took his wife on road trips and he said “’cause she’s too ugly to kiss goodbye.” A true original, and it’s a goddamned shame we’re stuck with a cheap knock off like his son Wade.

Best Power Back Ever

There have been better backs than Earl Campbell, but it’s a short list. Though when it comes to straight up power football, running through traffic and breaking tackles, I’ve never seen anyone better. Campbell had thighs like 50 gallon oil drums and was almost virtually untacklable. As a rookie, he came into Foxboro for the first home playoff game in Pats history (when Chuck Fairbanks had been fired and then reinstated the week before the game) and gashed the Pats for 118 yards. Unfortunately the pounding took a toll, and his career was cut short. But for a 6 year span, Earl was as good as anyone, ever.

Best Moment in Monday Night Football History:

Luv Ya, Blue.