For anybody who cares I didn’t sleep last night. Like not one wink. Why? Because I had a hideous day gambling. Here is what I had.

Phillies 5 inning Line +155 (LOSS)

Phillies Yankees 5 Inning Line Under 5 (LOSS)

(I knew I was dead on both these after two pitches when I saw Pedro’s fastball was topping out at 78 and Jeter was laughing hysterically after he lined out to center to start the game.)

Celtics 1st half line -7 (LOSS)

Celtics game -12.5 (LOSS)

Celtics 2nd half line -10.5 (they won by 10. Would somebody please foul somebody! LOSS)

Dallas Mavericks +4 vs. New Orleans (LOSS)

Over in San Jose vs. Columbus NHL 5.5 (LOSS)

Over in Dallas vs. Calgary NHL 5.5 (LOSS)

That’s 0-8 for those keeping score at home. Momma said there would be days like this. But the game that just killed me was the Mavericks game. I doubt anybody was watching this or cared about it, but I just have to get this off my chest. The Mavs were +4 in the game. They pretty much led the entire 4th quarter. They were up 4 with about 20 seconds left and New Orleans had the ball. The Hornets got a quick layup and fouled Jason Terry who is a career 84% free throw shooter. Terry went 1 of 2 from the line making it a 3 pt game. Okay shit like that happens all the time. No big deal. The Hornets come down and Chris Paul gets called for an offensive foul with 9 seconds left. Then New Orleans gets a technical for arguing the call. Game over right? I mean it’s Dallas ball up 3 with 9 seconds left shooting a technical and then 2 free throws. So Jason Terry steps to the line with his career 84% free throw percentage and misses another free throw. I really didn’t care though because Jose Juan Barea and his 93% free throw percentage still had 2 shots to go. Keep in mind the guy was 15 of 16 on the season and all we needed was 1. Guess what happened? Yup he misses them both New Orleans comes down and Peja buries a 3 in my fucking face to send the game into OT. Doesn’t take a genius to figure out what happened from there. The Hornets obviously clobbered the Mavs in OT and my 4 pts dog somehow lose. Listen I know you get bad beats in gambling. But two lights out free throw shooters missing 4 out of 5 in the last 20 seconds including 3 in a row? Come on! That’s fucking bullshit. Like how do you lose when have the ball up 3 with 9 seconds left and the other team just fouled you and got called for a technical and you’re catching 4 pts! It’s impossible, it’s unfathomable, it’s unconscionable!

And to make matters worse or better however you look at it, the First Lady is away this weekend on business. Talk about timing huh? I’m in a huge hole. It’s Breeders Cup weekend and I’m home alone. This could get real fucking ugly real fast. Because anybody who knows anything about me knows that I don’t go quietly into the night when I’m down. I chase and tilt like you fucking read about. So stay tuned. This should be one hell of a weekend. In fact I should get a fucking film crew over here to document what is sure to be an excruciating rollercoaster ride that ends in total destruction. I bet I’d win an Oscar. I just hope the First Lady still has a roof over her head when she comes back Sunday Night.