(NYT) - About 43 percent of unmarried teenage girls and 42 percent of unmarried teenage boys have had sexual intercourse at least once, according to new research from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. In 2002, the last year such a report was published, 51.1 percent of girls and 60.4 percent of boys had had sex by 19. Data for 2006 to 2010, published last month, also show that most teenagers used contraception the first time they had sex — 78 percent of girls and 85 percent of boys, up from 75 percent of girls and 82 percent of boys in 2002. The birth rate for teenagers 15 to 19 during the period was 39 per 1,000, the lowest ever recorded in the United States. (The rate in Canada was 14 per 1,000; in Germany, 10 per 1,000; and in Italy, 7 per 1,000.) Teenage birth rates in the United States have been declining since 1991 and vary considerably by race and ethnicity.

Anyone think it might be because kids are giving blowjobs before they even hit double digits? I think “Sex” is on elementary school report cards now. Kimmy gets an E for sharing. E for cursive. And a S for Sex, seeing as she refused to give up the butt.

But seriously, how does no one know why sex rates are dropping? Do they live under a rock? It’s fucking easy. Have you seen porn and sex toys nowadays? It’s a fucking joke! Why put up with a chick’s incessant whining and need while you can watch porn that would make Ron Jeremy blush while you bang a mold of Jenna Haze’s pussy. It’s an absolute no-brainer. This isn’t your grandfather’s world we’re living in. No need to quickly jerk it in the bathroom with a tube sock full of Vaseline in to some crusty smut mag from 8 years ago. You can get as into it as you want. POV porn is the best invention since the lightbulb. Plop the laptop on your chest, hit control F, and you might as well be on the BangBus. It’s fucking brilliant! No kidding guys don’t want to deal with weeks of dating, paying for dinners and presents, listening to all kinds of personal problems and bullshit when they can just fire up some YouJizz. And the same goes for girls too. Why fuck some lame-dicked 16 year old when you can get a pocket rocket that gives you multiples all night. Hey there’s a reason I wouldn’t let my ex get a dildo and here’s a secret, it wasn’t because of the price tag.

Porn: keeping your kids out of the abortion clinic! Although porn does scare me a little bit. I mean if I can’t jerk-off to the same porn twice, how the fuck am I ever supposed to get married?