Barstool Intern Update: Introducing Our First Intern “Danny Boy”
So I just met our first intern over here at the Stool. “Danny Boy.” I made him come over to measure our new office space so I could buy some furniture for it. God bless him. Kid handed me some paperwork to sign and I swear to god he was shaking like a leaf. I told him relax bro. I put my pants on one leg at a time like everybody else. Now I know what everybody is thinking. How did this kid already land a job? I thought you were doing interviews and shit. Well relax. I haven’t even started the process of going through the 21 year old interns yet. I’m going to do all that shit this weekend. This kid is like a junior intern. An intern for the interns if you will He’s 18. He’s green. He’s nervous. He’s like the Stool Mascot. He was desperate for an internship and just wants to work his ass off and do whatever he’s told. Plus he lives around the corner from Barstool World HQ’s and offered me the use of a pool all summer. Ding! Ding! Ding! Also it doesn’t hurt that his name is Danny either. Now whenever the shit hits the fan I can use the old “Do You Have Any Pride Danny! Well Do You Danny!” line on him from that famous youtube high football speech video that I can’t find anymore.
PS – First Lady already asked for his cell phone number so she can boss him around to do her errands and shit. Not even joking.
Doulbe PS – I’m not sure this kid is going to make it. After I took his picture and told him I was going to mock him he asked not to put his last name or school. Hmm, the thick skin part may need work still.
elpresidente | Random Thoughts | 03/12/10, 3:15 pm |
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42 People have left comments on this post
looks like your illegitimate kid.
Prez: Are you my pal…”Mr. Internship Winner”?
Danny: Yes, sir! I’m your pal!
Prez: How about a Fresca?
he needs thicker skin, he won’t cut it
i’ve often thought of becoming a golf club.
never know, could be a great intern! just teach him your ways, prez. good luck, danny!
guess he passed the ‘Gives EP a BlowJob’ part of the application
Ahha Great White, I came here all ready to break the seal on caddyshack references just to find that you’ve beaten me to the punch…nice work!
i believe mcmurphy beat us both.
“First Lady already asked for his cell phone number so she can boss him around to do her errands and shit”
He will be crawling out from under her desk when you walk in sometime. . . or else she will be sreamin’ “DANNY BOY, OH DANNY BOY!!!” the next time you get it on with her.
When you said you were going to hire an 18 year old intern and one of the requirements was sucking your cock all the time, we all should of seen this coming.
he does have his hat on backwards
He is hiding your load behind that stupid grin isn’t lol, good luck Danny remember to cup the balls
Once his mommy reads this blog for the first time it will be his last time coming into work.
ep, get some pictures of his mom poolside.
thanks.
^^ guess that ass material
you should use him as the producer on the powerhour, i bet he can do a better job than kmarko can.
kmarko should stick to the disco ball and masking tape on the ceiling, and the funny blogs
Is this Sam Adams? I smell a scandal!!!!
Do you do drugs Danny?
Everyday
So what’s the problem?
You should make him your Barstool mascot…. get a company to make you some sort of person size barstool and make him wear it to work, events…. maybe he should come up with a barstool fight song… these are all probably pretty bad ideas, but I’m not on your payroll so fuck you anyways.
He looks like he has loading dock fever.
Looks like he knows a broom in the ass is inevitable.
What hockey team is he redshirting for?
I wonder what a reference letter from EP would look like?
I wonder what kind of “chores” the First Lady has in mind for this kid…
He was definitely molested as a child
Is there really a Fetish & Kink Party advertisement on here for March 19th… Why don’t you send him to that for his first assignment; that should be great blog material.
someone tell him its not 1995 so he cant rock his adjustable hat backwards
First order of business for Danny the Junior Intern: Get that baby lamb.
Why has no one compared him to Danny Noonan yet? All I can picture is El Prez being his Ty Webb.
“You’re not being the ball, Danny”.
I love the Randall Graves hat style. Please get him a shirt that says PORCH MONKEY 4 LIFE. Obviously I mean a button down shirt, with the writing on the back, so he can have the front of the shirt opened, with a ball dont lie shirt underneath. I should be a stylist.
» Section 41 said: { Mar 12, 2010 – 04:03:45 }
Why has no one compared him to Danny Noonan yet? All I can picture is El Prez being his Ty Webb.
“You’re not being the ball, Danny”.
like 5 people posted CaddyShack references on here bro.
Big-Baby-is-half-retarded said: { Mar 12, 2010 – 04:03:49 }
“Someone tell him its not 1995 so he cant rock his adjustable hat backwards.”
Agreed. Can’t wear an adjustable hat backwards. Get him a black BSS cap if he’s going for the reverse-cap tough-guy look.
This is the stupidest hire I’ve seen in years. SoCo had it hands (heads) down. Not only that, you wasted weeks worth of A1 prime material by not posting job applications. Could not convince the First Lady that item # 5 was just a joke, could you?
Danny, your life just hit a major crossroads. Either you will skyrocket to famedom, or your life is now over as you know it. I hope the former. Godspeed son, Godspeed.
p.s. if you ever blew a guy in college or fucked a tranny, you better cover your tracks now before your shit blows up Danny boy.
Looks likes he’s got a high ass voice. And where the fuck is your office? Underneath Fenway?
im disgusted, i should have known a wannabe lax bro would be EP’s pick for his intern
poor guy looks like he’s tryin to hold back from shittin himself.
and im still gonna go with…pick me pick me! …tell me why intern #1 was not a girl? prez, get your priorities straight
Oh Danny Boy how I’ve seen you grow. Proud to finally see the kid get out and do something I wish I could be doing myself. Try not to embarrass yourself too badly
That tape doesn’t have a unit of measurement small enough to measure black dude’s dick.
Kid is on Barstool and he doesn’t want his name or school mentioned. Jesus Christ….pussies would be dripping.
El pres. hire me. I’m use to doing bitch work and ill let you put my last name up and my school.
excuse me i mean El Prez, im an ass.
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