Mirror – A woman is being sued by her husband for allegedly trying to kill him by putting poison in her genitals and then asking him to perform oral sex. The Brazilian wife is accused of planting a toxic substance on her genitals before luring her husband to bed. Reports in the South American country suggest he was ready and willing, and only escaped death because he noticed a strange smell. The curious husband then took his wife to hospital in Sao Jose do Rito Preto to find out the cause of the unusual odor. The alleged attempt on his life was exposed when tests on his wife discovered traces of a poisonous substance down below.

 

See this is the difference between guys and girls. When it comes to something like oral sex, guys would never in a million years think of fucking around with poison. You may hate your girlfriend and want her dead, but when you’re getting blown all that shit goes out the window for ten minutes. It’s a sacred time. Whatever murder plot you may have been concocting during the day is put on the back burner while a chick is sucking you off. That’s how dudes are because dudes are normal.

Girls on the other hand…they’ll risk poisoning themselves just to poison their husband while he’s eating them out. That’s how psycho they are. Always holding grudges and playing an angle. Using sex as a weapon. Literally. Seriously ladies, you want guys to start going down on you more and not just fingering you for 30 seconds before sliding it in? How about not packing your pussy with toxic chemicals? That’d be nice. Guys won’t have to worry about getting rat poisoned in the sheets. Would really lift a weight off my shoulders, that’s for sure.

Fucking chicks these days. They complain that you don’t go down on them enough and when you finally do they squirt poison down your throat. Typical passive-aggressive behavior.