(Telegraph) Carme Cristina Lima, 32, was running for councillor of Itacoatiara, in Brazil’s northern state of Amazonas. Police became suspicious when they saw a crowd allegedly gathering around Ms Lima’s car on the morning of election day on Sunday. Officers searched her car and allegedly found hundreds of packets of cocaine attached to the candidate’s leaflets with instructions on how to vote for her. Speaking to Brazil’s TNOnline website, police chief Daniel Ottoni said: “There was a large gathering of people around Ms Lima, but when they saw the police they all ran away. “The candidate and another man also fled by car but officers caught up with them. “According to locals, she had been distributing the drugs since early in the morning, on condition that people vote for her.” Ms Lima was arrested for electoral corruption and drug dealing.

This lady is such a moron. Don’t get me wrong, handing out bags of coke to impoverished Brazilians will get you elected 100 times out of 100. But how the hell is it worth it? Coke costs like a billion dollars and city council sucks. Seems like throwing good money at bad. I mean what the fuck does a city councillor even do? Don’t they just like plan the St. Patrick’s Day parade and Carnival fireworks shows? Sit in a board room and listen as rickety old citizens march up and complain about pot holes and youths and the school system? It’s not like you have any real power. I mean if you want the job then you’ve definitely found a way to get it, sweetheart. But that sounds so awful I’d rather sit in a room and blow lines until my nose caves into my skull.