Brazil – More than 2,400 Brazilian inmates are on the run after they were granted a holiday vacation home but surprised prison guards by failing to come back. Of the 26,486 given furloughs for good behavior over the Christmas and New Year’s holidays, prison systems from 26 states and the Federal District report five percent remaining at large. Perhaps more surprisingly, however, is that the majority of 45,000 men and women willingly returned. According to the penal execution law, the inmates are those from minimum security prisons who have shown good behavior and have completed at least a sixth of their sentence. Criminal law allows eligible inmates to spend up to five holidays with their family, usually being Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, Children’s Day, Christmas Day and a date of their choice.


Huh. You’d think inmates would be keen on returning to jail, what with the overcrowding, horrific living conditions and sodomy waiting for them. Just don’t understand why they’d choose freedom over eating gruel and getting shanked in the yard all day. Real brain buster. Being treated like cattle has so many benefits. I’m just as shocked as these prison guards that 2,400 dudes didn’t return for their dehumanization.

Just think, next time you hire a landscaping company it could be full of escaped Brazilian prisoners who fled to the US. That’s pretty cool. As long as they weren’t in for a fucked up crime like rape or murder or kicking dogs, I got no problem with people who did some time. Always makes you feel badass to hang around people who’ve been in the clink.

But the real question is did all 2,400 inmates flee in the same car?