DM — An Ohio woman is begging on the streets but she’s not homeless or desperately hungry – she wants bigger breasts. Much to the dismay of fellow beggars who desperately need money for food or a roof over their heads, the bikini-clad woman has been making money and turning heads with her plea for plastic surgery. Holding a sign that reads ‘Not homeless. Need boobs’ the woman, who only identifies herself as Chrissy, 37, has been standing on a busy street corner in Akron, Ohio.

I don’t hate this lady’s game plan. It’s a strong move, for sure. But she has to add some perks. No one wants to give you money so you can get a great pair of tits and go shove them in some other dude’s mouth. That would be like buying a girl dinner when you know she’s running home to fuck someone else. Gotta give daddy a taste. Treat this program like a kickstarter. Someone gives you 5 bucks, they get a picture of your new tits. 10 bucks, they get a post surgery lap dance. $15, topless handjob. $30, blowjob where you do that move when you shake your tit on his balls as you suck his dick. And for $50 they get to fuck you, tit job and all. Seriously you’d be on the operating table in a week with that business strategy. Check out that guy behind you, he’s got a crisp Ulysses S Grant just burning a hole in his pocket. It’s not whoring, it’s philanthropy. Do you want those symmetrical C’s or not you flat chested freak?