Cojoined Sisters Getting Their Own Reality Show
DM – They were never expected to survive beyond a few days. But conjoined twins Abigail and Brittany Hensel have not only proved doctors wrong, they have astonished them with their development into darling children, typical teenagers and, lately, beautiful young adults. Now the 22-year-olds, who share one body fused at the torso, will be starring in their own reality TV show chronicling their graduation from Bethel University in Minnesota, their post-grad job search and their travels through Europe with friends.
Can I tell you what frustrates me as a blogger? I know for a fact I already wrote something impossibly funny about these conjoined twins back in 2009 and I can’t find it. It’s like when you lose something on your computer and have to start over. I’ve already spent more time trying to retrieve it than I would have if I just started from scratch. Such a kick in the balls.
Anyway it’s tough to hate on these bitches. I mean it can’t be easy going through life looking like the next villain in the Batman series, but they seem to be handling it pretty well. Just laying out and catching rays acting like they don’t have two heads. You have to especially respect the head on the right. Talk about a raw deal huh? She’s like stuck on there sideways. Like if you’re gonna be born with two heads at least give me the vertical one.
PS – Since I know everybody is going to ask they have only have one vagina. Not sure if they both feel the sensation of getting stuffed or not or what happens if one chick gives permission and one doesn’t. I assume they both have to cosign. And yes I’d let them pity blow me. Probably be pretty fucking wild.
bahahahahaaa!! see you in hell
One vagina, but twice as much talking? No thanks.
Two heads aren’t ALWAYS better than one. . . . . . .
I’m speechless
great double the nagging. these bitches are why double barrel shotguns were created. well them and aurora, colorado movie theaters
Abby probably shoulda quit while she’s ahead
one on the right is definitely the secondary head. like, if the body was dying and they had to remove one, it would be her. she’s gotta know that, right?
I’ve seen worse looking chicks that didn’t have two heads. I’d be down.
Mo’s blog >
this..thing looks like a butchered photoshop job. should take it out behind the barn and put it out of its misery
You could have one sucking your cock and the other tounguing your balls and taint, I wonder if they both feel an orgasm or just 1? I’d fuck ‘em just for the novelty of it I suppose
also it may arguably be the 3rd hottest of the sisters
Atta boy Portnoid!
Double bagger.
Is it twin sisters? Or just one freak with two heads?
said on Mo’s blog, will say it here… this fucking terrifies me.
Nevermind titty fuckin, think they let guys put it between their necks?
Bull shit they share a body. thats one girl with a mooching parasite head of a sister
“looking like the next villain in the Batman serious”…you have to be doing this shit on purpose at this point, right?
Could you imagine seeing this out at a bar one night? Imagine the nutcase that fucks it, like holy shit that would be a crazy story… One is sucking your dick while the other is going to town on your asshole
@pacostacos – i just shit myself reading that. bravo you sick fuck
As close as I could ever get to a 2 on 1. it would have to count right?
Whats the logistics here? I mean is it a threesome from the word go or is the determining factor the one snatch? Two women can’t live in one house much less one body so one’s got to be a bitch right….how about buying this bitch(es) a drink at the bar…do I have to buy two drinks for one puss or what???
Pres would you make these ho’s (or this ho) buy one or two tickets to your foam party?
does having sex with this thing count as having a threesome?
there’s a picture floating around of them sucking some dude off. go find it.
only thing I can think of is the clone room scene in Alien Resurrection…see these bitches on a table with tubes coming out of them groaning “kill me” horrifying shit…also…who controls what?? like do they each get a leg? each an arm? who controls the sphincter? obviously one of them runs the majority of the show…so one of them never has to feel the discomfort of having to piss and shit? so many questions, not sure I want the answers
I can’t get over this, do you think they can read each others mind? What if ones tired and the other is wide awake? Just borrow the body for a quiet stroll while the other one sleeps? Who has controle of the body?
I wonder if they take the same exam or two separate ones while in school? Is it cheating if you discuss answers with someone when they’re literally attached to you?
god imagine if they each felt only one half of the clit? You’d be down there working like an asian child putting iPhones together, it would be like AP Pussyeating
I bet these 2 could be pinball champions… think about it, 4 eyes to control 2 arms, 2 eyes on 1 paddle, 2 eyes on the other, they wouldn’t miss a thing… No worrying about which paddle to hit and when… just crush your own flipper.
Does anybody else think they resemble Johnny Knoxville?
They already have a reality show… It’s called a fucking carnival.
If I had no controle of the body I’d be the biggest bag of shit, drink every night, eat all types of spicy foods, never work….. Wait I think I just describe black people
schaffnuts, that might have been the most random albeit funniest comment i’ve ever read on this site. bravo.
following on the comments, what if one chick wants to fuck and the other doesnt? is that rape? does she just sit there and watch? what if one dies? the other has to carry around the dead head forever?
Hey you Mr. Dealer man, I been checking out cars, I know which one that I want, yea yeaaaa I want this one…. cars.com
Television has finally hit rock bottom.
Wow. This is by far and away the greatest barstool moment in history.. at least top 5. Knockout topic, pres kills it, comment section feasts. I fucking love free, ignorant, protected, ridiculous speech. Real talk though, KO barstool has to have exploded if they read this right? Or gotten so wet it’s not even funny
Also I would eat their box
If they each control one arm, do they take turns wiping the asshole? How does that conversation go?
If they have to puke, does it come out both mouths?
If you’re dating one, does that mean you’re not allowed to let the other one blow you even though you’ve technically fucked her?
http://stepsmut.com/abby-and-brittany-hensel-the-two-headed-conjoind-twins-blowjob-pic/
Odds are 100% that they lez out when drunk.
A plus comment section.
histpres doing his own dirty work, props on the effort.
Shouldn’t these girls have gone to Harvard or something? Because you know they collaborated on every test/assignment thy ever did, which should result in straight A’s.
http://www.bebo.com/c/video?FlashBoxId=7845114807
apparently, one of them is engaged but the other one is not..and they have separate drivers licenses. what happens if one of them gets a DUI?
Who they go get their hair done is it a 2 for one deal? What happens when one is a dyke and the other like dick? Who gets controle of the pussy when?
This comment section is literally making my entire day in this shitty office bearable. Thanks y’all!
I want to hate fuck one’s face, and stare down the other.
Endless list of questions we’ll never know the answers to.
@wombshifter: That sucks, two dudes have to share one pussy. And the marred one is technically cheating every time her sister hooks up.
I’ll bet they fuckin SUCK at basketball. “Good luck on the monkey bars at recess today girls!’ -Mrs. Hensel, 15 years ago
Holy shit what happens when one wants to masturbate and the other one doesn’t? What if you had to consult another person to give yourself the stranger?
I have to know what school is like for this two headed bitch. What is test taking like, do they put a sheet between their heads so they dont cheat? Do they need 2 school IDs or one? What if one wants to be a psychologist and the other wants to be a Vet? So many questions.
“in the Batman serious” ????? Grammar check before posting Portnose!!!! I bet these chicks still wouldn’t date u.. Not a fat, balding, hunchback..
Question – so if you are fucking it from behind and shoot a good rope between their heads do you give yourself 1 or 3 points?
Yeah, you could arm wrestle yourself. One controls the right , one the left. But then what kind of mind fuck would it be to try and start controlling both??? Just like driving, talk about the ultimate backseat driver. Having your own left hand correct you? WTF indeed. Like could you trip yourself on purpose to land on the other head to fuck with it? I’m totally focused on this shit now. Ruined my day.
What if they get pregnant, who’s baby is it? What if one commits a crime and the other couldnt stop her? Does she get put on trial also? Or is she required to serve as a witness?
^ If one commits a crime, do they both have to go to jail?
Hey Pres I bet you would get smoked by that thing in a watermelon eating contest. No question at all.
Side note: With a really large rubber band in the mouth and a foot in the back you could make a MEAN slingshot…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n6Y5fVU6w0Q
Do they have 2 stomachs? Does only one of them have to eat and they both get full? Does only one of them have to breathe? What the fuck is going on here? I remember seeing them years ago on like TLC and not reading too much into it, now that they’re adults what is up with their lives? Do they have sex lives? Do they each feel half of their pussy? When they masturbate, is it basically like they have their sister jerkin them off? SOOOOOOO many questions.
The show should just consist of this thing taking questions from viewers and answering them honestly (starting with all those posed here). Must see television.
if one of them drinks do they both get hammered? all the fun of getting drunk is drinking but that might be kind of cool to get fucked up without having a single sip
Something tells me that if you bump into them or give them a slight nudge, they probably fall over pretty easily. Very top heavy.
They both beat Pres in the Spartan race, Brittney finished in a time of 1:47:32, Abby finished a half second behind her.
If they both end up getting married to different guys, wife-swapping would be pretty anti-climactic (pun not intended but totally intended) for their husbands.
how do you go to sleep every night staring yourself in the face? do they have 2 dentists work on them at the same time? when they are in a car which one gets to use the headrest?
If one doesn’t want to do something and the other does, is it just like Me, Myself, and Irene where they fight with themself?
“Vagiclean, huh? What’s the matter, honey? Little extra cheese on the taco?”
also when rating them on looks, if one is a 3 and the other a 1 does that make them a 4? or do you average it?
If they end up getting married to different guys, I imagine wife-swapping would be pretty lame. Husband-swapping, too for that matter.
Lago for the fuckin win!
This shit is hilarious great comments people!!! Pres take a hint, you should do a guess that freakshow blog, or like a freakshow of the week, this stuff is awesome.
if one of them takes a load to the mouth does the other one taste it? does it pay taxes as two separate people or just one? do they each have to work a different job, like one of them sleeps during the day shift and vice versa? most importantly, can they make out with each other?
I just realized they are basically frozen in the pose of two chicks trying to share a facial.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U4eVdx7u7iY&feature=youtube_gdata_player
Can you imagine if you are a soccer goalie and this thing is taking a penalty shot? They each are looking different ways… you don’t stand a chance.
Is there any sort of creative control in regards to manicuring their half of the vagina? Would I get to see half a landing strip and half old school 70′s bush?
Do they take turns wiping after a shit?
or do they just have a staring contest while the log slides out and whoever’s face cringes the most is obviously the shitter and has to clean up.
^^Is one in charge of piss and the other in charge of shit or do they rotate jobs?
What happens if one dies before the other?
I know Abby. She loves anal. Haven’t met Brittany yet.
one is engaged and one is not? THEY ARE ONE PERSON! You can’t just marry one of them.
They don’t count as two people. Two people can walk away from each other.
And who the fuck wants to marry a two headed monster?
This shit is disturbing. So when the dude bangs her, he doesn’t take turns kissing each of them? They don’t give him double blowjobs? When they fight with each other, do they resort to biting each other?
Best comment section ever.
So pissed I got here late. I bet they have those crazy twin powers. Like if one got pissed at the other, they could make each others heads explode, Scanners style.
Rexisfat A+++++++ infinity.
I need to add this to my DVR schedule. This outta scare the shit out of my wife.
@StanSitwell Literally in tears laughing at that AP Pussyeating comment
Do they lose consciousness when they try to wear a turtleneck sweater?
Is it wrong i want to see them kiss each other?
Does that count as lesbian sex or a self pleasure video or incest?
Where would it be under youporn?
Can one suck a dick while the other updates people on Twitter/Facebook about it?
So many questions. They need a blog.
hey Abby nice boob
imagine giving the job interview when these 2 walk in
It would be crazy if side was taking a nap and front decided to fingerblast herself. Do they both have orgasms? Talk about a wet dream made easy.
Redefines the meaning of double bagging it
Poor kids, tough to find a fake ID that would work for those two.
You know the vertical headed one is so bitter about this freeloader on her shoulder, holding her back from a normal life.
I can’t wait for the episode when they are on spring break and the crowd gets them to make out with one another.
I’m literally crying from laughing at work reading these comments..I can’t even answer the phone right now
Reminds me of “The Sidler” in Seinfeld come to think of it. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NKx2Ko6HJc0
Man, imagine just going to town with a super rough gagging BJ from the one you were dating….while the other one tries to give you privacy. Fuck, now I need to jerk off. Curse you, Portnoy.
Imagine hitting that from behind? That would be wild.
If vertical head goes to jail, would the sideways head have to hang out of the bars?
Ohh ho ho, imagine an eiffel tower. Fuckin dualie heads
If one head gets married and has a kid, would the kid call the other head “Aunt Mom”?
Imagine if one head works days and the other works nights? At their respective jobs, the other head would be passed out and drooling all over the place.
Why aren’t these bitches on our Olympic soccer team? Imagine trying to defend them on a corner kick. Which head is going to take the header? Or it could be a combo shot like in billiards. So many possibilities.
What kind of special wide angle lens would one need to film POV porn with this doppelganging whore?
I think it goes without saying that if they find two dudes who are also mashed together like this, they have to fuck, right. It’s like forcing pandas to get it on at the zoo. They may not want it, but everyone else demands it.
wow that must be the most frustrating shit in the world having some dickhead attached to you nevermind some fucking bitch with one titty and one arm
What if front said yes to anal but side said no? Is that rape? Pres I know you have a bunch of knowledge on this. And how fucked up would it when one is saying “yes” and the other is screaming to stop.
Imagine if one was a chick head and the other a dude head????!?!?!