Detroit — Kristine Diven thought she had her dream house. For $500 at a tax auction in October, she and fellow artist Micho “Detronik” McAdow bought an empty two-story home on Detroit’s east side. Thrilled with its crown molding, hardwood floors and fireplace mantels adorned with Pewabic tile, the pair planned to fix it up and move in by spring. As a first step, Diven, 36, prepared to board up the Morningside neighborhood house to protect it against vandals and wintertime damage. But when she and McAdow drove down Beaconsfield Street one evening in December, their new house was gone. “Instead of taking measurements for the boards we needed, we found our house in a pile,” she said. “When we drove up, I thought what I was seeing couldn’t be right,” Diven said. “In the past (few) weeks, it’s almost like being in mourning.”

How fucking stupid is this couple? You bought a house for 500 dollars in the worst city in the country and you’re actually surprised that it was torn down? You sincerely thought that you were gonna head on over to the east side of Detroit and the dream house you just bought for a denomination of money that comes in a single bill would be waiting for you? A paradise of crown molding and hardwood floors and fireplaces with Pewabic tile? Absolutely not. You can’t even be a little bit mad about this let along claim you’re in mourning. If you buy a house for 500 bucks it will get torn down 11 times out of 10.