Ocala, FL (The Weekly Vice) - Ashley Holton, a 35-year-old Alabama woman was jailed Sunday after she allegedly masturbated in front of passing motorists on a busy Florida highway, then resisted arrest. According to the Marion County Sheriff’s Office, Holton was wearing nothing more than a pink shirt when she decided to pull her car over on Highway 484 near Interstate 75 and then masturbate in front of passing motorists. Holton’s display of self-love attracted the attention of motorists – several of which committed illegal U-Turns to watch her. Holton continued to engage in the sex act for a half hour before deputies arrived on scene.

What the fuck was going through the several motorists’ heads who were pulling U-Turns in the middle of the highway to catch another glimpse of this broad? People turning a “busy Florida highway” into the set of Fast and Furious just because in ugly chick is sticking her fingers in herself. I could have been going 45 on the I-75 that day purposefully taking in all the scenery and still wouldn’t have given this bitch a double take.  I mean masturbating?  A solo scene? What are we in kindergarten?  No fucking thanks. Chicks like Ashley Holton get the same treatment a YouJizz thumbnail gets. You hover over it for a few seconds and get the screenshot preview but if there’s no dick then I’m fucking out. Call it gay all you want, if it doesn’t have a money shot then it might as well be Nickelodeon.