ARLINGTON, Va. –  Arlington County Police say a 31-year-old Arlington man has been arrested and charged with malicious wounding of his roommate after waking up to find male genitalia had been drawn on his face with permanent marker.Police say James Denham Watson assaulted his roommate Saturday morning, causing him to be taken to the hospital with extensive injuries to his face.

 

DO NOT DRAW DICKS ON THIS GUY’S FACE!   REPEAT.  DO NOT DRAW DICKS ON THIS GUY’S FACE!   Because guess what?  He doesn’t think it’s funny at all.  He’ll maliciously wound you for it when he wakes up.   No dicks on the face.  Total non starter with this dude.  How furious do you think this guy is that the dick is still on his face for his mugshot too? Just adding insult to injury.

As a side note has any roommate in the history of mankind ever misunderstood or underestimated their roommate more than the guy who drew the dick on his face?  Like you’d have to assume that he was kind of friends with him right?  Probably never saw the malicious wounding coming.   Oh well.  Live and learn I suppose.  Don’t commit the crime if you can’t do the time.