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NYPOST – A New York mom who said her botched boob job left her looking like she had four breasts was awarded $3.5 million for pain and suffering, the New York Post reported Thursday. “I hope this will give other women in the same position the courage to come forward,” said Maria Alaimo, 47. The jury found that Dr. Keith Berman botched her 2003 plastic surgery, which was supposed to be a breast lift and augmentation, leaving her with an embarrassing condition known as “double bubble deformities.” Describing the condition, her lawyer Michael Kuharski said, “It appears like there’s two breasts (on each side) stacked on top of each other.” The bungled surgery even contributed to the end of her marriage, he said. “She slept in a different room, she’s depressed, she lost her self-esteem,” said Kuharski. “She ultimately pushed her husband away to the extent that he filed for divorce.”

With all due respect to chicks who have four tits this condition should not be known as double bubble. Double Bubble is a piece of gum. Everybody knows that. The two things should not be confused. It would be like calling this condition Hubba Bubba or something. You got to come up with something unique that’s not trademark infringement. Like to quote that 3rd grader from this morning again how about “bitch that looks like she has 4 tits bitch. Boom, done. That works.

PS – I know what everybody is thinking. Having “bitch that looks like she has 4 tits bitch” disease sounds like a blessing in disguise. After all the more boobs the merrier right? But something tells me it’s not as hot as it sounds. I mean she did get 3.5 million for it and her husband divorced her so it can’t be that cool.