PANAMA CITY — A man invited a woman into his house, even though he knew her to be a thief because she had stolen from him on numerous occasions in the past. Once she was in the house, she lured her host into the bedroom with the promise of sex; she held up a condom and told him, “I need to use this on somebody.” At this point she must have had his full attention, because after she left his bedroom (without any sex having occurred, by the way) he noticed his wallet, which had been sitting on his nightstand near the bed, was a little light. By the time he realized what had happened, his guest was gone, and so was his money.

You can judge this man all you want. Say he’s an idiot. Say “fool me once, shame on you. fool me twice, shame on you.” Say all you want. But the fact of the matter is when a chick drops a condom in your face and says “I need to use this on somebody,” the game is over. That honey trap will catch the burliest of bears. There could be the threat of dying, let alone just losing your wallet, and you’d still take the risk. If a chick holds a condom in your face and says she needs to use it there’s a 100% chance she’d fuck your dick clean off, and nothing will keep a man from a taste of that. It’s the perfect Siren song. Sure you’ll probably end up clinging to the rocks with your hard dick in your hand and no money in your wallet but you still gotta try. Ask Odysseus, we can’t all stick wax in our ears.