20100403_March20100403_March

PORTLAND, ME - About two dozen women took a walk down Congress Street topless Saturday  attracting a large crowd as they tried to preach that partial female nudity is not worthy of attracting a crowd. The point of the march was that a topless woman out in public should attract no more attention than a man walking around without a shirt on, said Ty MacDowell, 20, of Westbrook, who organized Saturday’s event and promoted it on Facebook. But as the event got under way in Longfellow Square, the marchers were soon outnumbered by scores of onlookers — mostly young men eagerly snapping away with cameras and cell phones. MacDowell said she was surprised by the turnout of those interested less in challenging societal convention than in seeing partially undressed women. “I’m amazed,” she said, and “enraged (at) the fact that there’s a wall of men watching.”… the picture-taking was particularly upsetting. “A lot of people were taking pictures without even asking,” she said. “Even if you’re somewhere where people are fully clothed, you should ask.”

So to review:  A gang of angry, grandstanding lesbians arbitrarily decide to march down the streets of Portland with their pale, pasty tits flopping all over the place in (pun intended) broad daylight, and they’re shocked… SHOCKED!… to find that this draws a crowd?  And they’re angry to learn that in 2010, 99% of people are walking around with cameras in their hands and will start clicking away?  Have I pretty much summed up the situation?  Now granted, I’m not an angry Feminist Studies major and a fringe crackpot like Ty MacDowell.  But I have been paying attention all these years and one thing I’ve learned that she hasn’t yet is that people who are kicking around downtown Portland on the first nice day of the year, minding their own business and enjoying the day, aren’t interested in challenging societal convention.  They’re interested in sending pix texts to their friends that say “OMG!  Check out these beasts flashing their juggs in public!  LMFAO!!!” If you want to stay anonymous, try wearing a muumuu.  The sooner you get that through your head, Ty, the better off we’ll all be.

(Thanks to Tom G.)