NESN - Bridgeton, Maine, doesn’t seem like the sports capital of the world by any means, but once a year, competitors from all over (this year featured two young teammates from California) come to face off against each other to see who can call themselves the world champions of four square. The rules are simple: Start in the one square, get to the four square, and every serve you make gets you a point. You can only hit the ball with your hands. The outside lines are in play, and the inside lines are out of play. Defend your square and stay on your toes.

I can’t believe the 4 square World Championships were held in Maine this weekend and I missed it. I mean I know I say I’m good at a lot of stuff, but no joke I’m was/still am a 4 square legend. Like half the rules kids use nowadays I probably invented. Shit like “Angry Fan” and “Popcorn” were my thing. I’m talking I’d stay in 4 square so long that by the time I got eliminated I already had made enough gimp bracelets to feed a small country. Cobra stitch too. Yeah that’s right, I said it. Cobra stitch. So it’s just a fucking shame that I didn’t know about this because I would have loved to add this title to my trophy case.    Oh well, I guess there’s always next year.  Hey Tiger Claw, I’m coming for you bitch. I’m coming for you.