Eric Wilbur in the Globe – The legend is dead, the prince has turned back into a frog, and…well, use whatever other cliché you want. A performance as bad as Tom Brady’s tonight in Super Bowl XLVI deserves a lead just as lame. Sorry, Tommy Boy, this one’s on you. Your hideous performance led to the Giants’ 21-17 Super Bowl title win. How embarrassing for your coach, your teammates, and your fans. But especially for you, boy wonder. It was one thing when you led the game off with a safety…What happened to the Patriot Way and clock management? What happened to you? What an embarrassment for the Patriots organization and Bob Kraft… Maybe that moment will actually hit you as you’re whittling down water slides in South America looking like Prince Valiant this spring… you had opportunities, and you failed to make them. Add to that your blunders, and it all becomes about you. You blew this Super Bowl. You denied your coach No. 4. You let down your teammates. Eli and Peyton now have as many rings as you combined over the past five years. You haven’t sniffed one in seven. How’s that hit you? Maybe it doesn’t hit you as hard anymore, and maybe that’s the problem. The safety killed the Patriots. Killed them. And there’s nobody to blame but Tom Brady. However hard it might be to swallow, the glory days are gone. Even Montana handed off to Mallett at some point, right?
I have two words for Eric Wilbur: Thank you. I’ve been sitting here feeling sorry for myself and this guy comes along like Vito Corleone to shove my Johnny Fontaine into a desk and slap the self-pity right out of me. This is exactly what I needed to help me on the road to recovery. I’d been through all the Stages of Grief: Sorrow. Denial. Drunkeness. Hangover. 1000 Yard Stare While Driving Your Kid to School in Total Silence. Thoughts of Splitting a Truck’s Headlights With Your Car on the Way Home. Sullenness. And finally, Wallowing in Your Own Misery. And the fastest way to reach the final stage of Acceptance is through Hating on the Media. So Wilbur’s insane, pointless rant couldn’t have come at a better time.
What the hell is this exactly? A column by a sportswriter in a supposedly major newspaper or the nonsense of some angry fanboy on a message board? There’s not a man, woman or child alive who can read this and not know it’s 100% personal. That Wilbur has some personal beef with Brady and this was his chance to get back at him. How else do you justify this? I mean, did Brady throw a ball away to avoid a sack in the end zone or did he burn the Wilbur farm to the ground, rape his animals and salt his crops? Or worse, cost this writer a bet? He made a mental error and underthrew a bomb to Gronkowski. And that was enough to lose a razor-thin game. I get that. But this wasn’t Brett Favre forcing balls in that he had no business throwing just because he wants to be a Gunslinger. Besides, what does any of it have to do with Brady growing his hair long and taking his family to a water slide during a lockout? What goddamn business is that of a Globe writer, unless he’s got some private ax to grind? Does this guy have the slightest idea what the Patriot Way is? It’s working hard, being accountable and putting your team above yourself. Can anyone argue Brady doesn’t do those things better than anybody?
Newsflash, paper boy. I happen to be one of those Brady fans, and I’m not “embarrassed.” Am I disappointed? Of course I am. But in a league full of lazy nitwits, criminals, rapists, quitters, dog killers and just plain untalented quarterbacks, I’m the furthest thing from “embarrassed.” And I’m no less happy to have Brady running this offense than I was when I woke up yesterday. Someday we WILL have a Ryan Mallett under center and we’ll long for the days of “Prince Valiant.” And speaking for Mr. Kraft, his coach, his teammates and the rest of his fans, we don’t give a tuppenny fuck about your moral conundrums, you meat-headed shit sack. But I appreciate you snapping me out of my funk. I’m almost back. @JerryThornton1
PS. This doesn’t go for all Globe writers. Like the one who quoted me in the Globe Magazine yesterday is alright by me.