Florida – Parents at the Community Christian Academy in Stuart were more forgiving than condemning on the first day back at school following a teacher’s arrest Saturday. Port St. Lucie police arrested Amie Neely after a 16-year-old foreign exchange student who lived with her family told neighbors he had just been kicked out of the house “for having sex with Amie.” “I was shocked, but it goes on everywhere,” parent Kelly Eldridge said. “That’s sad.” According to the arrest affidavit, Matthew Neely tracked down his wife Saturday using a smart phone app that tracked her phone via GPS. Police said Matthew Neely found Amie Neely a few blocks away from their Port St. Lucie home in a parking lot near Centennial West High School with her pants down in the front seat of the car. Amie Neely told police the boy had been pressuring her for sex and because of her own “midlife crisis issues,” she gave in. She denied the boy’s story that they’d been having an affair for several months.
Finally America’s Sex Scandal Teacher State goes international. This is like that moment in “300″ when Xerxes asks for Sparta’s surrender and says “There is much our cultures could share” and Leonidas looks around at the piles of dead Persians and says “We’ve been sharing our culture with you all morning.” Wherever this kid is from, his parents didn’t send him to Florida just for oranges, Disney World and crooked college football programs. When you”re a foreign student staying in Florida, you bring them some crap from whatever godforsaken hell hole you come from like funny hats or coins with queens on them or smelly cheese and whatnot. And you expect back in return nothing less than a teacher in the front seat with her pants down around her ankles. THAT’S real cultural exchange. U!S!A! U!S!A!
Looks: Low rent, 99%er Ann Romney? Grade: C+
Moral Compass/Bad Judgment: This is one of my favorite details in the history of GtSST. Amie’s husband tracking her phone like she’s a migrating dolphin only to find her pantless with the very kid he let into his home is priceless. Simply priceless. They probably have an app just for following Florida teachers going on sexual trysts. Grade: A+
Intangibles: Is there anything like hearing the mom of a student shrugging it off as “it goes on everywhere”? As in “Well, crazed horny 38 year olds will be crazed horny 38 year olds. Whatareyagonnado?” Lucky for the kid Amie’s married to Mathew Neely and not Cam or he would’ve dropped the sticks & gloves and knocked that punk back to his ancestral homeland. Grade: A.
Overall: B. “Florida: America’s Wang” strikes again.
[Thanks to @Christiancatani. Big story for the Christians] Have information about a hot female teacher having sex with her students? Preferably with pictures? Help make the world safe for Teacher Sex Scandals by Tweeting me @jerrythornton1.