If anyone was wondering why the Patriots, a year after hitting two home runs at tight end with Gronkowski and Hernandez, would use a 5th round pick to get TE Lee Smith out of Marshall, maybe this will explain:

July 25, 2006 – An assistant principal at Powell High School is under investigation by the school system after she was accused of having a sexual relationship with a student and changing students’ grades.  Assistant Principal Kim Kallenberg, 36, is being investigated… the student at the center of the sexual relationship allegation is Joseph Lee Smith, a football standout from Powell with a full athletic scholarship to UT this fall. He’s a 6’6,” 245 pound tight end who committed to the Vols on signing day in February… Smith, one of the top prospects in the state, scored six touchdowns during the season. He was also named All American and All South by various publications…  Another rising sophomore, Ali Shockley, said, ”I’m not really surprised because, like he said, there’s been rumors about that and stuff and so it’s really not surprising.”

This story more than any other sums up exactly what kind of player Bill Belichick likes to build his team around.  Simply put, Belichick likes winners.  Whether it’s a 6th round QB who ends up marrying the hottest supermodel on the planet or Rob Gronkowski making the lockout his bitch or a blocking-specialist TE out of C-USA who banged his Assistant Principal, Belichick wants guys who win the Game of Life.  And that, my friends is Lee Smith.  Winning scholarships, scoring touchdowns, getting some horny size-queen cougar to change his grades, that’s the kind of kid you want to fill your locker room with.  It’s like Steve Marucci said in “The Brady 6,” you can measure a guy all you want, but you can’t open up his chest and measure his heart.  Let the other teams get caught up in 40 times and 10 yard splits and bench presses.  We’ll take the guys with that unmeasurable ability to make a hot MILF to risk her career for the chance to bone him.

Granted, Ms. Kallenberg denied the charges, Smith gave a sworn statement saying they never had sex and the charges were dropped.  But this is one of those times I’m going to believe it happened just because I want to believe it.  So I’m with rising sophomore Ali Shockley, it’s really not surprising.  Lee Smith: athlete, scholar, All American, Sex Scandal Teacher hero…. Patriot.

The Grades:
Looks: Not bad.  Not bad at all.  Sort of a Leslie Knope with a few factory upgrades.  She’d probably get a decent grade were this any other story, but since Kimberly is linked to the heir-apparent to Alge Crumpler, she’s getting a Grade: A+.
Moral Compass/Bad Judgment: Again, I have a slight problem with all this “Nothing ever happened” talk, but I’ve never been objective when it comes to the Pats and I’m not about to start now. Grade: A+.
Intangibles: Kimberly Kallenberg, putting the “Vice” in “Vice Principal.” Also a top notch porn star name if this whole school administrator thing doesn’t work out.  Grade: A+.
Overall:  A+. Jarod Saltalamacchia marrying his gym teacher.  Lee Smith in a Sex Scandal with his Assistant Principal.  Is this blogger heaven?  Get on it, Celts and Bruins.

Have information about a hot female teacher having sex with her students?  Preferably with pictures? Help your fellow man by sending it to jerry@barstoolsports.com or tweet me @jerrythornton1.