Harvard Girl Is World’s Fastest Crawler
Crawl bitch! Crawl! Seriously though this is what it takes to get into Harvard nowadays huh? You got to be a world record crawler. No wonder I didn’t get in. You can’t get by with just an awesome sense of humor anymore. Anyway the funny thing about this video is that this nutbag inadvertently summed up my exact philosophy on why I think Lance Armstrong is a joke.
“I thought that crawling was something if I trained really hard for I could become the best in the world because there aren’t many people who crawl”
Bingo sweet knees! That’s what I’ve been saying for years about bike riding and lacrosse and shit. Try a real sport where more than 5 people compete at it and we’ll see how great an athlete you are then.
PS – I want to break this world record so bad I can taste it. In fact I was already putting on my jacket and getting ready to go smash this thing until they showed her crawling at the end of the video . I nearly spit out my coffee when I saw that and I wasn’t even drinking any. I mean say what you want, but this bitch can fucking crawl.
Wtf, that’s not even that fast. But I guess one more thing Boston dominates.
whoa. that was some mean crawling. impressive.
perfect.
http://kissingsuzykolber.uproxx.com/2009/12/you-facks-ahhh-nawt-the-true-16-0-team.html#more-22363
think she likes it ‘doggie’?
You’re welcome for the tip…
You think if you got behind her doggie style, she’d crawl away?
WHAT A DISAPPOINTMENT…..I thought there would be footage of her like crawling next to sprinters or something…..
This has got to be a joke….the last few seconds of the video with her crawling across the floor were bizarre. And yes, she definitely loves it from behind.
Mexican word of the day: Juicy
As in, “Juicy Randy Moss on Sunday?, he no berry good mang”
admit it, who else tried crawling after this? i didn’t think she looked that fast, but i just tried…..DAMN SHE’S FAST…..i can’t move at all doin that shit
fuck ‘Swifty’…she’ll be a hit on the greyhound circuit in no time. (the little horses still run, right?)
The Crawl Of Shame works too.
That would have been great if they had let a pack of dogs loose on her while she was on the track! They see a bitch like that on all fours–it’s ovah!!
EP, how many times per day are you going to use the “I nearly spit out my coffee and I wasn’t even drinking any” line?
I thought at the end she was going to be like the creepy bitch in “The Ring.”
That was more of a letdown that finding out that the ‘Does this look like a face’ guy today was actually a chick.
How are riding a bike and lacrosse related in any way?
Dont beat yourself up EP cause you were never in good enough shape to play lacrosse (which is way more similar to hockey or football than baseball is, never mind biking).
Bahahaha! If you need to explain which sport(s) lacrosse is more like than others, you can be sure it is an obscure sport like bicycle riding and crawling on the floor.
I never said it wasn’t obscure, cause universally, I agree it is. However bicycle riding, while gay, isn’t obscure. So sweet argument jackass
at least she knows where she belongs…but really crawling? This is a joke. And Prez it became even more of a joke when you compare it with you lacrosse comment. Now prez we all know you have no athletic talents at all and that probably why you like baseball so much but lets get serious here you’d get your ass kicked if you played. At least if you gonna make that comment be from the midwest where it isn’t a big sport but your from the northeast where it is huge you idiot.
Umass… so which position in LAX did you play???
Umass:
Quick: name another bicycle race besides the Tour de France. See, it is obscure. They’re both obscure. That’s how they’re the same. So YOU’RE the jackass, jackass.
You know what the hardest part about playing lacrosse is?
Wanna’ know how I know I’m high?
I just went to Google, “Really Deep Quotes” and 2/3 of the way through the search, my mind wandered & I ended up on RedTube…..
FML?
Stop, Drop and Roll bitch.
I want to see her crawl against the St. John’s cross country runner. Race of the century.
i thought people from harvard were supposed to be smart?
obscure sport like bicycle riding
so obscure that it’s one of the top sports in the world and pro riders make millions.
It’s like saying “Formula One is amateur racing!!! Give me NASCAR!!!”
And all these “sport experts” think the NBA is a real sport and those are atheletes.
Get a little bit of a clue.
40oz – Attack. Not really sure what point you’re trying to make or if your just curious.
Jermaine – Not surprisingly you completely either ignored my point or you’re too retarded to understand it. So I’ll just stick with what Perk said and hope you’re not from the northeast or else my money is on you have one or two extra chromosomes.
I’m not ignoring your point, I’m refuting it.
“I never said it wasn’t obscure, cause universally, I agree it is. However bicycle riding, while gay, isn’t obscure. So sweet argument jackass”
Bicycle riding is in fact obscure. Therefore your argument fails.
For proof:
1) How many people can name another race besides the Tour de France? 2) Or another cyclist besides Armstrong (and maybe Lemond)?
3) Go to any of the major sports sites on the web and scan the list of the top sports across the top (e.g., sports.yahoo.com). You know, the top sports that most people want to know about? I can assure you neither lacrosse, nor bicycling, nor speed crawling appear.
4) Evaluate sports by the number of participants, TV ratings, advertising revenue, athlete endorsements, etc. and you get the same result. Cycling is on TV in the US when there isn’t a good ice skating show available.
Very few cyclists make millions. The rookie minimum salary is approaching that figure for non-obscure US sports.
Hey, if you want to put on your little shorts and ride your bike, fine. If you want to play lacrosse and convince yourself you’re as tough as a hockey player or football player, fine. But don’t drag us down into your little fantasy.
5MM, if you don’t think NBA players are athletic, perhaps it’s you who need to get a little bit of a clue.
Way too much time wasted on discussion of such obscure sports.
You’re still ignoring the fact that I never claimed to have any knowledge of bicycle riding, which I said was universally popular. Go ask 100 people all over Europe to name ten bicycle riders and ten NFL players. And as far as the money goes, you’re right professional lacrosse players make next to nothing and you don’t seem them crying about it like in other sports.
And the main point I made originally was just because you dont know anything about lacrosse doesnt make it gay.