Holiday Gift Idea For Her – MunkeyBarz
Holy yes please! If you can’t fuck like a champ with a pair on handle bars strapped to your girl then you might as well turn your dick in. Whenever I’m banging doggy I always end up basically squishing the girl. Put way too much pressure on her back and her legs slip on the sheets and we end up flat as a pancake. Look like that high school kid wrestling the one with cerebral palsy. Just wiggling and writhing around trying to get in the right spot. Unless you’re perfectly compatible heights it’s basically a geometry lesson to line up genitals. Not anymore folks. I’ve never bought a sex toy before but Christmas 2012 is the year of the MunkeyBarz. What did I get you under the tree, babe? Oh just a bunch of screaming orgasms in the form of a workout belt with a pair of Mongoose handles strapped to it. Best boyfriend ever. Can’t wait til they come out with the pegs so her girlfriend can come everywhere too.
Just gotta find a girlfriend first because if you ask a random chick to put these on she’s all of a sudden 100% sure you’re gonna kill her.
Slap a cup holder on that bad boy and you won’t be able to make them fast enough.
I have a sudden urge to pop a wheelie.
can’t wait to see some clueless, muscle head asshole doing squats at the gym while wearing this.
you know its kind of a cool idea, but then again what are pig tails for? or a womens hips? im going to stick to the all natural handlebars for sure. plus this thing covers up that skanky tramp stamp i love to stare at while doing it doggie
Any woman that would fuck you would be too desperate to care if you killed her.
BLUMPKIN PLEASE
Cue the Neil jokes
I’m sure your boyfriend will love having something extra to hold onto.
do they make a set for the head too?
Call me odd, but I would much rather grab her hips or ass than a piece of plastic.
Feits, who are you kidding? You’re buying this because your a top, you fag.
They need to make this with a musical button that plays the critically acclaimed hit Quack Like a Duck
Don’t worry, Sales Guy. They make them in a size 46 waist. Pres will love it.
What the hell is this world commin to… (Buford T. Justice voice)
is she supposed to hang pots and pans on that?
great for bench pressing fat chicks, “Looking for bigger biceps? Go strap-up Olga and do some curls”
it’s funny to me that if you mouse over the chick in the pink thong’s butthole, a “2″ pops up on your screen.
Frankenass……or some weird lesbo scissoring device…
Beadle said there are plans to add various accessories, including different sized handles, O-rings for more hardcore S&M play, a silver bullet vibrator that can be controlled by using one of the handles as a throttle, and more.
by BossHogg
do they make a set for the head too?
Yeah, there called ears.
@renee_portnoy we all know feitelbergs a bottom
*they’re
Unless you prefer dainty little fairies, I’d think the dudes you bang would have a strong enough core to not slip
Where is gaystoolie on this?
Here’s a wild idea. Instead of buying some absurd contraption that only a self esteemless whore would ever wear, why don’t you just pull the girl over to the side or end of the bed and stand behind her? Better view, and much better traction. With your feet on the floor, you can absolutely unload, you avoid getting tired, and you line up perfectly with any height. Kneeling on the bed is for suckers. Also, if anyone other than a freshman in college says they can’t pull this move off because their mattress is on the floor, kill yourself.
Neil is wondering if this thing would strap around his neck.
Call me old fashion, but when it comes to handle bars I’m all natural baby. So what if she’s a little chunky? Fat bitches give phenomenal head…FACT
Great…we’ll be seeing this shit on a Paul, Jr. design any week now.
I took mine to the dude from Seven for some standard upgrades…
Remember those tassels they used to put on trikes and bikes? Put them on and then you could market this bad boy to the gays too!
If I have to hang on both handles, how am I going to stick my finger in her ass?