If You Even Think About Drinking Mountain Dew’s New Breakfast Drink You’re An Uncivilized Savage
NEW YORK (AP) — If you don’t like coffee or tea, Mountain Dew has a new breakfast drink that might perk you up. PepsiCo Inc. is rolling out a new drink called Kickstart this month that has Mountain Dew flavor but is made with 5 percent juice and Vitamins B and C, along with an extra jolt of caffeine. The company, based in Purchase, N.Y., is hoping to boost sales by reaching Mountain Dew fans at a new time of day: morning. PepsiCo says Kickstart, which is carbonated, is also not a soda because its 5 percent juice content qualifies it to be considered a ‘‘juice drink’’ under guidelines set by the Food and Drug Administration. A spokeswoman for the FDA said the agency doesn’t have definitions for what qualifies as a soda or an energy drink.
Hey Mountain Dew. You’re gross bro. Let me say this loud and clear. If you drink Mountain Dew for breakfast you are a savage plain and simple. An uncivilized savage and I don’t want to associate with you. I’ve never felt stronger about anything in my life. Seriously if you see somebody drinking this for breakfast I think you should be able to shoot them on the spot. Hell if you see somebody drinking a carbonated beverage before noon you should be able to murder them. There is just no way anybody who brings any value to society would drink this shit. If you want caffeine in the morning drink coffee. Period.
How old are you?
I think it’s stupid to ban drinks like Four Loko and probably this when some dumb nutsucker bro dies from it. Weeding out at it’s absolute easiest.
If Coke isn’t in your top 3 hangover drinks you’re doing it wrong
1. Mt. Dew is fucking delicious, so fuck you. 2. Have you ever had an energy drink before, or does Rene not allow it?
construction types love this kind of garbage, they swill Pepsi and the like at 6 in the morning while barreling down Rte. 24 while blabbering into their Nextel direct connect…
I think Mountain Dew is fucking terrible, but it might have the most loyal following of any soda. Some people drink nothing but that glorified weasel piss.
Bullshit screwdrivers with this shit hangover gone!
I think we can all agree the only real flavor of Mountain Dew is Baja Blast
Says the man that never worked a day in his life. I would inject caffeine on a work day morning let alone have a breakfast dew.
Diet Mt. Dew is my life blood.
Mountain Dew is for people whose social skills only allow them to communicate via XBox headphones.
“Hell if you see somebody drinking a carbonated beverage before noon you should be able to murder them.”
If crushing a few beers before noon while plowing in a snow storm is wrong, then I don’t want to be right.
Why is everyone hating on this. This is better than most shit, I would gladly drink this with my 200mg caffeine pill. Beats drinking a monster.
for once, EP is right. people who don’t drink coffee in the AM but get their caffeine another way are clearly developmentally disabled and/or sociopaths.
Can you make an enema out of it?
I think what chowdah head meant was: If coke isn’t in your top 3 hangover drugs you’re doing it wrong
I wonder if it’s a Kosher Energy Drink? This has to better than RC Cola.
Vanilla coke zero and sprite zero are the two most delicious non alcoholic drinks on the planet and acceptable to drink any time of day
whats the difference between this and a monster rehab? Im no caffine slut but ill take a red bull over a coffee erry day
Somewhere along the way Pres confused hyperbole for comedy and hasn’t strayed from that formula in a single blog since. It has become predictable and tiresome.
Mountain Dew? Only when the store is out of Fresca.
Mountain Dew is no doubt the biggest white trash drink on the market.
@imtough – a more accurate comment has never been typed on this site
Some of us go to work in the morning and don’t just sit at a computer in their pj’s drinking hazelnut k-cups.
Until they want to advertise on BSS…then it’s the greatest drink since beer.
You write like its surprising people drink these all the time in the morning
…yet you would sell ad space to them for 50 shekels
good you thing you specified that the savage is of the uncivilized variety, as opposed to the savage who wears a shirt and tie and attends pta meetings
El Pres is calling us savages from the lavish wonderment of his apartment complex.
@imtough
that’s probably cause rt. 24 is in brockton, slumdog.
im gonna open one of these, shave before i shower, then shit after the shower, wipe standing up and put on my cargo shorts, go shopping with a cart, and watch some barstool bloggers head explode
Don’t worry guys, I speak a little Joo from when I was in the service. Loosely translated this blog says “I’m not drinking this stuff until it goes on sale or they offer a coupon.”
Only weirdos drink Mt. Dew regularly. If you drink new breakfast Mt. Dew you probably weren’t in the popular group in high school
imtough’s comment was funnier than anything on the site today…and extremely accurate.
I’m drinking this shit. Fuck making coffee.
Mountain dews for x-games squids who werent got at real sports in high school.
Good*
Some of those “squids” are multi-millionaires who get to live their dream and fuck japanese girls in the snow.
@imtough – hilarious.
Fuck off Pres…Sometimes a little carbonation in the morning is refreshing. Especially with a bacon egg and cheese mcmuffin. Then I sip my dollar coffee. I’ll be trying a can of this for sure so eat a dick Portnose!
probably will taste better than red bull or any of that shit, not that ill drink it tho. but whats wrong with drinkin the dew? no different than havin a pepsi or sprite
wow, just fuck all of you. Soda, and mountain dew more importantly is fucking delicious. Maybe I don’t feel like having diarrhea at noon from coffee and the dick smell that comes with it. I don’t ever plan on drinking soda for breakfast but I sure as hell isn’t gonna drink some shit inducing brown boiled water, rather drink one of these. Not to mention, coffee beans will be extinct in 20 years, look it up asswipes
this was a shitty blog. I want those 90 seconds back.
What’s wrong with carbonated beverages before noon? Only women refuse to drink beer at 9am.
@RexRyansaFatClam – what D III Mass HS Soccer team did you play for, bro?
Hey asshole, do you know what I drank every morning when I was in Afghanistan? A Ripit. You think I should be murdered? Fuck you.