what’s for lunch in the caf today? Big Sausage Pizza

TSG - A California middle school teacher has been placed on leave after administrators learned from students that the educator appears in porn videos available online. Stacie Halas, a 31-year-old science teacher at Richard B. Haydock Intermediate School in Oxnard, was removed from the classroom Monday, three days after pupils reported spotting her in a series of X-rated clips. “Maybe it’s not a crime as far as the penal code is concerned, but we feel it’s a crime as far as moral turpitude is concerned,” said Jeff Chancer, superintendent of the Oxnard school district. School brass said “We ask that parents be particularly vigilant over the next few days with respect to the Internet content being accessed by your child on his or her telephone or other Internet-ready device.”

Stacie Halas didn’t just shoot a casting couch porn in college for a few bucks. A little research has proven this girl worked for Reality Kings. Stacie Halas was Tiffany Six (NSFW link) and into some pretty kinky shit. Anal, interracial, pretty sure there’s a scene where she’s got one of those fake dicks dumping like 3 gallons of milk onto her. I mean this lady was a fucking FREAK. So much so that I don’t even blame the school district for suspending her. You wouldn’t be able to have a staff or PTA meeting without picture Ms. Halas’ gaping asshole.

But what I wouldn’t give to be one of those kids. Last night must have been better than a snow day and summer break combined. The fucking happiest anyone has ever been to be home from school. Kids sprinting up to their laptops. Hey Ms. Halas you didn’t get to give me my anatomy lesson today. What do you say we pop open those legs and study the labia. Firing DNA onto their stomachs rather than sample slides. “Yea sure thing, ma. You can monitor my internet use for the next few days. But don’t be surprised when you come across Ms. Hala catching a bukkake.”

Oxnard better have extra nurses staffed tomorrow because there are going to be a lot of pulled forearm muscles coming around.