Miltons Pimp My Look
Time to reload the Miltons machine. Send all sob stories to pimpmylook@barstoolsports.com or pimpmydate@barstoolsports.com and help us help you. And you need to send pictures! If you sent an email without a picture resend with one to be considered.
Today’s Contestant
Reader Email
Dear Pres,
This is my friend Ed, long story short, he’s a disaster. He’s a great guy, just gets the absolute drunkest every time and pukes on chicks. His style is comparable to a tall 7th grader. His outstanding shitheadness has also landed him in the hospital with a hole in his esophagus, caused from drinking so much and puking. It has been a roller coaster couple of weeks for Ed- one week he’s sucking on his first titty and the next he finds out he’s out of commission for a month. Therefore I figured, what better time to get your act together than the 30 days of no drinking. Please All Mighty Pres, help improve my friend, it would benefit us all.
-Squantum
(346 votes, average: 8.88 out of 10)
Loading ...
Jerry Thornton Jr. can’t be part of the contest, BSS rules prohibit friends and family from participation in any contest run by BSS.
No chance any of these kids have ever been laid.
Which one do you think has the ‘ Poop Dick’ tattoo on his ass?
i sort of feel bad for them.
Hey if nothing else he’s better than the usual fat retard featured in this contest. Always confused why anyone would wear glasses though instead of contacts.
Looks like my boy TK from he swamp, Pres. Funny.
Squantum is nothing but a bunch of pussies
suckin on his first titty dick
*dick. damn strike through
He’s like a retarded McLovin.
I don’t know what’s more likely: this kid being a virgin or seeing a girl in a black North Face tomorrow.
Gabe for the win.
This kid has a bad case of the douche
No amount of the glen ordway Tommy Bahama special is going to hide that jew honker. That is why he will win. He’s so like prez.
Ugly %u221A
Huge beak%u221A
Virgin til 30%u221A
I can’t wait for his website when he reinvents himself as an outstanding athlete who slays mad young pussy
this kid right here might be the biggest loser in all of new england. his fucking friends suck. kids need more than a miltons makeover. they definitely ate paint chips as kids.
there hasn’t been a single one of these fuckin geeds that i’ve been like, yea, good for him. fuck these people
Bro looks like he’s getting ready to take a gay money shot to the grill in that second pic.