NYPost – They deserve a knuckle sandwich. Stingy Subway sandwich honchos are shorting customers by serving 11-inch “Footlong” subs, hungry New Yorkers say. The Post discovered that the city’s lunchtime crowds are getting short-changed after a muckraking Australian revealed the company’s famous “Five-dollar Footlongs” were smaller than advertised. Four out of seven Footlongs — purchased at Subway locations in Manhattan, Brooklyn and Queens — measured only 11 or 11.5 inches, according to the test. And that’s not the only corner Subway is cutting — the shops have sliced their cold-cut sizes by 25 percent in the past few months, a Manhattan franchise owner told The Post. Smaller heroes and less meat have fired up loyal regulars — who now have a different kind of beef. “They’re cheating us!” said 32-year-old Juan Rivera, who runs a hardware shop in Brooklyn Heights. He eats Subway every other day with his father — but now he feels betrayed. “That’s foul and misleading. They state it’s a foot long, so it should be a foot long!” His regular Subway shop in Brooklyn Heights — on Montague and Henry streets — sold The Post a $6.75 “Italian BMT” that measured only 11 inches. And those extra few bites can really add up. If you buy a $7 “footlong” every other day for a year, an axed extra inch adds up to a loss of roughly $100.

 

Those bastards! Shorting us inches on our subs and lining their greedy fat-cat pockets with stolen cash! Lets riot! Lets picket! Lets burn those motherfuckers to the ground! No justice, no peace!

I dunno why I found this so funny but I did. Like die hard fans up in arms because their shitty sub was half an inch short. They’re buying the lowest quality meats for the lowest possible price and going ape shit like they’re getting ripped off. Hey guys it’s Subway. They’re the ones that microwave your fake chicken and claim a dude lost 200lbs by stuffing his face with mystery meat. Not exactly a sandwich shop of excellence ya know? Not talking Al’s on State Street here. Don’t get me wrong, I’ll eat it from time to time, but who eats Subway and afterwards is like, “man that was delicious.” Nobody. You kinda just eat it because you need sustenance, you don’t wanna spend a lot of money and it’s close to your office. Nobody is going out of their way to find a Subway.

But you can always count on the NY Post for hard hitting investigations like this. Right in the middle of the craziest story ever the Post is whipping out rulers at sandwich shops and bringing us the real stories. Just measuring footlongs and doing the lord’s work.