This is becoming another annual tradition blog here at Barstool Sports. All fucking week my facebook feed has been has been blowing up with kids stressing out about Finals and how much they have to study and shit. Well I want to give all my college stoolies some advice. Chill the fuck out. Finals and grades in college are the biggest scam going. Employers don’t ask for your report card. They don’t even check if you graduated. You’re getting all stressed out on something that literally doesn’t matter. Now maybe it’s different for Ivy League kids trying to get finance jobs and shit, but I’m talking about everybody else. I don’t care if you go to Dean College, Salem State, Bryant, Umass or what. Just walk into a job interview and say you went to Stanford or some shit and nobody is gonna be any wiser. Or just say you got straight A’s wherever you actually went to school. Or say you got D’s because you didn’t try. As somebody who hires college grads I can tell you 100% that I don’t care. I don’t judge candidates on report cards. That means nothing to me. I judge them on how they interview and the specific skills that they can bring to me not on how they did on stupid test that has nothing to do with anything. Grades mean dick. Just say you got a 3.8 on your resume to get you in the door for an interview, stop worrying about it and go fuck a chick and enjoy college while it lasts. That’s the best advice I can ever give anybody.
PS – If you really want to stress out about your future than worry about internships and what you do for summer jobs. That’s about a billion times more important than your report card. That’s the shit I care about and so does every future employer. Or be hot.