Questions That Have Bothered Me Forever…What Happened To Waterbeds?
So I wrote a blog yesterday about wanting a grass bed and it kind of jogged my memory about something more realistic. I think I need a waterbed. Like why don’t more people have waterbeds? Is there something I don’t know about them? Because every-time I’ve ever laid down in one I’ve fallen to sleep instantly. And forget about the sex. You can’t beat it. Not that I’ve ever had sex on a waterbed but it seems straight out of a porno. Almost too sexual. Yet despite this I don’t know anybody who has one. I haven’t seen or heard about them since the 80’s. They came and went like the wind. What gives? It seems like the biggest no brainer in the history of earth. Do any Stoolies have a waterbed? And if not how come? Because I just decided that I don’t want a waterbed. I need one. Circular like a motherfucker too.
The reason you can’t have a waterbed is because your nose would cause flooding
2 words tempurpedic foam
I had one long befor I got married. The best sleep EVER!
Then I got married. Game over.
Bob’s Discount Furniture started out as a waterbed retailer.
Maybe you will get one for Chanukah this weekend El Hebe.
Here, David…they even have round ones: http://www.thewaterbeddoctor.com/
You’d probably poke a hole in it the second you role over with that nose of yours
when you are filling up your new water bed, seal neil inside
Used to have one. They are good, but have some drawbacks. If you ever need to move one, its a total bitch to do as you need to drain the whole thing. Second, there’s always the fear of waking up in a foot of water because it sprung a leak in the middle of the night (had it happen).
As for the sex, at least in my experience it wasn’t any better than a regular bed. If anything, its a pain in the ass to maintain balance on the thing when you’re hitting her from behind. Then there is always the fear of her heels puncturing the mattress and springing a leak (again, had it happen).
You having a waterbed in your apartment would be the only way Renee could ever get wet.
I have one, although it’s rectangular, and agree with 100% of what you just said
You’d have to wear a life preserver to bed
My heater on my waterbed broke at night when I was younger, passed out shitfaced, woke up with hypothermia.
Couldn’t fit one in your studio apartment so forget it.
Surprise to no one I’m sure, but I had a waterbed for about a year. It was a hand-me-down, which is disgusting enough. Not up to the hype. They take forver to heat up if you forget to turn them on. Sex = no good. I want my head banging off the headboard, not slip sliding away.
Prez if you want a waterbed, try golden showers with your wife. She likes that shit.
Waterbeds destroy your back.
Valid question Elnose, i have slept and fuck on those bad boys and they are uncomfortable as fuck for morethe than one person to sleep on. You should get one forMovember your fucking deeds or lack therof and one for sleeping with your bitch or the salesman.
They’re only $200. At that price you can buy 10,000 If they accept internet dollars.
The 70s ended.
Had a waterbed when I was younger.. a few issues – 1, the heater. If it fucks up you wake up freezing like Kramer when he fell asleep in his hot tub, or if one of your asshole friends cranks it and you wake up all sweaty. Not a good start to the day. 2, leaks. 3, if you are heavier than the person you’re sleeping with you can either have a nice spot in the middle for the two of you or you end up rolling in between the mattress and the side of the bed. 4, sex isn’t all that great, you lose all leverage a nice firm mattress gives you.
two words…needle dick
My parents had a water bed til the time I was about 12 years old. Thought it was so awesome. I shudder to think about it now.
“2 words tempurpedic foam”
Oh boy, don’t mention foam or Jewboy will be all over the Tempurpedic company as a new sponsor.
Ask for one for hanukua
Ask for one for hanukua
Ask for one for hanukua
I had a super single my parents bought my brother and me in the early 80′s. Best sleep ever.
the worst if power went out or you didnt realize the heater wasn’t working. Waking up with a hang over wondering why your sleeping in your cloths on a pile of your coats
the worst thing about owning a waterbed…is admitting that you are poor white trash.
David, is that what you want for hanukua??
David, is that what you want for hanukua??
David, is that what you want for hanukua??
David, is that what you want for hanukua??
Has there ever been a waterbed owned by a black person? I hope not.
Pinokioportnoy, why don’t you ask that four more times just to make sure you’ve covered all of Hannukah.
rs1234 is spot on with #4… CG works out well, but anything else seems like a fuckin mess
Nothing better than relaxing in a waterbed after a long day of rollerblading up and down the boardwalk with your t-shirt hanging out of the back pocket of your jean cut-offs.
Pinokioportnoy 100% just created his account
pinokioportnoy603, not sure what is worse– Your inability to hit “Post Comment” one time, or the fact that you just made your account because you thought you had a killer joke.
pinokioportnoy603 – Asshole
Waterbeds promote rape culture.
First dry handy in 7th grade on a waterbed. Came all over my stomach. Such memories…
they kill people.
I wonder if the heaters ever have an issue you redundant fuck-tarded doucheberries. pp603, go guzzle that bottle of jizz in your fridge you cum guzzling queen.
@dirtball- your dad help you mop up when you finished?
Just drink a barrel of water before bed and you’ll have a waterbed by the morning
I built one in High School wood shop (Who Didn’t?) Get one with baffles. If you don’t. You or her could be bounced right off the bitch from the Ocean motion. The heated water can cause massive bed sweats if you don’t watch how high some A-hole sets it thinking that it’s funny.
Who is the retard that keeps spelling hanukkah wrong. I mean really fuck stick!?
Hahahah @4guys1barstool nail on the fucking head
Hahahah @4guys1barstool nail on the fucking head
And there I go with it…
Used to have one and they are great for missionary but doggy your knees sink in and give you a quad workout from hell.
my dad and step mom have a water bed and it sounds like they like it
@bluehen I left it there to dry and cake on as a badge of honor
Fire Neil and hire pinokioportnoy603. Sad to say but I think it’s an upgrade.
I’m sure a waterbed will help your stupid hunchback Pres, pinokio you are the worst.
Crabjuice23 nailed it.
In all seriousness their really not good for your back.