Race fans in Australia headed towards the Bathurst 1000 – a three-day race featuring touring cars with V8 engines and set to begin this week — are going to find their plans for wild drunken rowdiness slightly hindered. That’s because, based on bad recent experiences, the police are trying to crack down on binge drinking. Assistant Police Commissioner Alan Clarke explained that ”Police respect people’s rights to enjoy the race weekend, but will promptly act when the law is broken…” If you’re attending the race the police will be insisting that you stick to no more than one case of beer a day. Wine drinkers are also expected to exercise restraint, limiting themselves to a mere 4 liters a day. There are ways around this crackdown though, for instance, if you opt for lower-alcohol beer you can bring in 36 cans instead…

Are you kidding me?  What happened to the Australia I used to know?  The land of the 5 gallon drum of Foster’s.  Where, to quote the old Monty Python Philosophy Professor’s Sketch, “We don’t want to catch anyone not drinking.”  Now they’re turning the place into Salt Lake City?  It’s unthinkable.  I mean, asking a crowd of Aussies to limit themselves to a case of beer a day and their wives to stick to 4 liters of wine?  By God, it’s never been tried and I don’t see how it could ever work.  You might as well ask them to stick with caffeine free Coke Zero.  Besides, how is anyone supposed to enjoy auto racing with a blood alcohol level under .30?  It’s never been tried.  Not in Australia.  Not in the US.  Nowhere.  There’s only so much of watching redneck-driven muscle cars drive counter-clockwise a sober man can take.  If they tried to pull this kind of BS in America, we’d have a redneck uprising on our hands that would make the Civil War look like a bar fight.  So good luck with that, Assistant Commissioner Clarke, but I’m afraid you’ve brought and end to the proud tradition of the Bathurst 1000.

(Thanks, Slanch)

Race fans in Australia headed towards the Bathurst 1000 – a three-day race featuring touring cars with V8 engines and set to begin this week — are going to find their plans for wild drunken rowdiness slightly hindered. That’s because, based on bad recent experiences, the police are trying to crack down on binge drinking. Assistant Police Commissioner Alan Clarke explained that ”Police respect people’s rights to enjoy the race weekend, but will promptly act when the law is broken.