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El Pres (and others),

Get a load of this termination letter for a band director in my county. Dude got canned for multiple hilarious offenses including: remarking that a young girl band member was “playing the clarinet like she suckin’ a dick,” telling several female band members to “wear sports bras cuz your boobs is floppin everywhere,” assigning racially insensitive nicknames to students including calling an Asian girl “Pocahontas” which doesn’t even make sense, and many others that you can find clearly outlined in the attachment.  My favorite nickname was calling some white kid “Soul Train” because he learned how to dance (this is a primarily black school with a FAMU style band).

Hope you find this blog-worthy,

A loyal Stoolie 




First things first. I am totally going to start calling all Asians Pocahontas now.  That’s got to be the best insult that totally isn’t an insult going.   Love it.   In fact I love everything about this guy.  His insults.  His flirting with the hot chicks and chastising the ugly ones for having floppy tits.  His telling a chick she plays the clarinet like she’s sucking dick.   Calling the white kid Soul Train.  I love it all.  I’d leave it all out on the field for him.  Just blow my tuba till he told me I looked like I was giving head to Bieber.   I mean maybe if band had more guys like James Wilkons than it wouldn’t be so bandy.  Maybe cool kids would want to be a part of it.  Because you know what this guy sounds like?  A football coach.   And that’s exactly what these dorks need.