Reader Email – Pres How Do You Feel About Jenna Marbles Being On Ask Men’s 99 Most Desirable Women in the World List?
Reader Email
Are we really going to pretend this didn’t happen?
http://www.askmen.com/specials/2013_top_99/90-jenna-marbles.html
Andy
So everybody is asking me to chime in on what I think about Jenna Marbles being on this ASK MEN most desirable list. I was trying my best to ignore it because contrary to popular belief I don’t love ranting about how much I hate her. It makes me look petty and shallow, but it is what it is. Well I literally just got this email asking whether I was really going to pretend it didn’t happen. Fine. Fuck it. People want to know what I think? Well I fucking puked when I saw it. There you happy? I don’t care that Ask Men is probably run by all chicks or band club geeks and has no pulse on what real dudes think. I don’t care they had Michelle Obama at #33 and all the other idiot things they do. I don’t care that they are fake just like Jenna. I still puked my face off.
Because in case you haven’t noticed nothing gets under my skin faster than when I read something from her or her agent telling a cute little story how she was totally unknown and just making videos on her own until she finally got noticed. It’s the biggest lie in the history of lies. That’s what she was doing BEFORE I hired her. There was a direct correlation between nobody seeing her videos during her tanning salon days and everybody seeing her videos when she was hired full time at one of the largest blogs in the country. That’s why she made lists like this Ask Men one back in 2010 when she still worked at Barstool. She was already on her way because of us. Bottom line is If she’d just stop lying about this I’d probably stop talking about her despite all the other things she did to fuck me over. And yeah part of the reason I DESPISE Jenna so much is because I actually really liked her, treated her like a sister and was protective of her while she was here only to get stabbed in the cock. So no I don’t find Jenna desirable. I think she’s one of the biggest frauds on the planet. I don’t even know if I’d give her the privilege of shooting my load in her hair. I don’t think she deserves the right to clean it out. That’s how I felt about seeing her on Ask Men’s most desirable list.
PS – For all the people who think I hate Jenna because of how successful she is and I didn’t cash in on her you’re nuts. Jenna was never going to remain at Barstool long term. She was always going to outgrow us because she makes all her money through youtube. I can’t sell Jenna ads. I can barely sell Barstool ads. She had to eventually go the route she went. I even read the contract before she signed with her agent and said she should do it. It’s the fact she’s such an ungrateful twat and a fraud that drives me nuts. Bottomline is anybody remotely familiar with how it all went down at the end including everybody who works at Barstool is surprised I haven’t tried to kill her yet. The worst part is I can’t get her out of my face because she’s everywhere and people know it bothers me so everybody constantly sends me shit knowing it gets me riled up. It’s a viscous cycle really.
And just to clarify to all the ugly girls who love Jenna. She hates you. I do too, but at least I’m honest about it.



I know I’m in my 30s but who the fuck is Jenna Marbles?
Askmen is a piece of shit site. It’s like Esquire with a more homo-ish tone.
Probably where Neil will send his resume after Pres cans his ass.
I have never once laughed at one of her jokes. Not once. I have climaxed to several of her videos, though.
-
All kidding aside, she is a talentless hack and proof that most women don’t have the slightest idea of what “funny” is.
That was a cute entry in your diary Prez.
Holy FUCK. Pretty sure this chick is going to find her dog cooking in a pot courtesy of the Schnozz.
You Mad Bro?
That was a fun little evisceration to read.
I would still throw it in her if given the chance.
I would love to plow Jenna Marbles.
i’d still penetrate her
I can smell the dick-hurt all the way here in Georgia – you’re so fucking jealous of her it makes me want to spit my coffee out.
id let her blow my marbles
Jenna won this breakup by a mile.
Do you Prez, do you.
so, you just want her to credit you with helping in her success? seems reasonable.
Ask Men is gay, just like Details, Esquire, and pretty much all of the other “mens” magazines/websites
Dude, let it go. You know why Jenna doesn’t give you credit? Because you’re one of the cockiest assholes to walk this planet. You just said that there was a “direct correlation” between her getting popular when you hired her. You seriously have no idea how absurd a statement that is. Literally nobody and I mean NOBODY outside of New England and the other site spots knows what the hell Barstool is. You have this wild idea that you are one of the biggest blogs in the country, and you actually believe that. Fucking Perez Hilton is a more popular blog than Barstool. I’m sure Jenna got some sort of boost from Barstool, but nothing big enough to make her what she is now. She got to where she is because she has talent (NOTE: I don’t believe this but apparently teenage girls do). The reason YOU haven’t cashed out Dave is because you think you’re bigger than what you really are. You are a smut blogger who sits at a desk for 8 hours a day scanning Egotastic, World Star Hip Hop, and Deadspin. THAT is the reason you haven’t cashed out.
JENNA IS COOL WITH ME HOMIE, I HAVE HER PERSONAL EMAIL, EVEN THOUGHT I DON’T EMAIL HER, SHE FOLLOWS ME ON TWITTER @KINGBLACKDUDE AND WE ARE REAL LIFE FRIENDS ON FB, NEVER HAD AN ISSUE WITH HER AT ALL, BUT SHE 100% FUCKED OVER ELPRES, THAT I AGREE WITH , THIS BLOG WAS GREAT, SHOULD HAVE MENTIONED HOW SHE LOVED ME ON STOOLALA AND HOW I MADE THAT SITE BLOW UP, SORRY FOR THE CAPS, MY CAP BUTTON IS ALL FUCKED UP- SINCERELY BLACKDUDE
Why don’t you just tell what happened at the end w/ Jenna..? I think she’s horrible either way..
She is so unfunny it hurts. And yes I would fuck her. But I would need to cut her tongue off first and I would want Kermit to watch.
PS – eat a dick KO Barstool.
ficken-die-hocker = jenna’s dad?
tell us how you really feel dave…
“she was hired full time at one of the largest blogs in the country.”
I had no idea Jenna once worked at Egotastic.
Run to CVS and pick up some Summer’s eve, you whiny douche
not gonna lie. i would give her some ropes in her hair.
You tried to bang her.
She shot you down.
She’s figured out how to make real money making videos from her couch.
You take turns going door to door trying to sell blogads and planning bubble bath parties for 16 yr olds.
She’s winning.
You’re losing.
Get over it.
Pres – how much did you pay her when she worked for Barstool and how much is she making on her own?
Hey everyone, did you know that Portnoy fucked the designers of the Blackout Tour out of 250K?
see where she is in 5 years then talk about this shit. time will tell who really wins
anyone get the sound to work on that video, did ELPRES plan this shit out to blackmail her one day, if so, he really is a fucking mogul haha, transcript anyone?
you can’t take any list seriously that lists Michelle Obama on it.
Davey..lets be honest..you wouldn’t shoot you load in her hair because she doesn’t have what you love most..a penis.
@blackdude..you fuck Jenna on the reg too right? I have to give you credit though some of your comments on StoolLala back in the day were pretty funny
Prez you should have snuck some language in when you hired her that allows BSS to own the “Jenna Marbles” name much like Vince McMahon does with wrestlers that way you own everything she did while at BSS; blogs, videos, porn, Etc.
1 Deadspin
2 With Leather
3 MLB Trade Rumors
4 The Big Lead
5 Sports By Brooks
6 Barstool Sports
didnt even crack the top 5 bro. wtf
on a side note…Jenna has a sick body..but without makeup she looks like she may have a hint of the downs.
Sure, Jenna Marbles is hot… but she is nowhere near anything funny….
She appeals to idiotic girl sense of humor.
@andersmb i wish i did, yeah my comments where pretty fire, but then again look who was making comments on that site lol, 16 year old girls were pretty easy to one up, but the guys on there were pretty good
Without bringing race into this; is it me, or does Michelle Obama resemble a baboon?
rexisfat fucks Victoria secret models all day in this mansion
I have from some inside sources why Pres hates Jenna- Apparently, the week before she left and he shut down Stoolala, he let her borrow $10 for lunch and she said she’d pay him back on that Friday. So she left the office that Friday and still no money back for Portnoy. So he was at home all week stewing, just staring at his online banking and thinking how much better it’d look with $777 and not $767. Meanwhile, he can’t help but notice her blog traffic is falling and she keeps talking about YouTube videos and the agent and still that fuckin $10 is driving him crazy. So he tells her she owes him everything, she wrote the post saying she got big without him, he fired her. Then when she was walking out he told her to send him a money order for the $10. True story
Some real high-brow conversation on that secret video. Jenna may have a Masters degree but she sounds like an idiot.
shameonme do tell ?!?!
Jennas voice makes me want to blow my head off.
and why the fuck does she brag about a masters, isnt it in reading comprehension or something?
i’d fuck, but that doesn’t really say anything about talent. i want there to be a chick who’s funny ass balls and shakes tits and ass all over the place. i’d be the biggest Jenna fan in the world if it was warranted. but her videos just leave me saying “wow…what a loser.” girls just don’t get humor. my best material gets no response from my girl, but then the corny, “oh-man-i-shouldn’t-have-send-that-out-loud” jokes have her doubled over. side note: i’d beat Shelly ‘Bama OUT THE FRAME. chick has a donkey, i bet she can put it on you.
want to elaborate shameonme?
Ficken-die-hooker hates Pres so much that he needs to comment on blogs every day to tell him how much he hates him. Keep up the good work slapdick.
yea but didnt you fire her pres? and also, wasnt it a commenter who posted her ‘how to make people think you’re good looking’ video in the comment section and it blew up and you had nothing to really do with that? and didnt it boost your page views by like 1000 percent?
Dro man stays winning
and still waiting on shameoneme, unless he just got blocked
*send = said
jacoby pretty sure she posted it on boston as a taking you into the weekend on a friday and didnt put the barstool mark on the video
otwisted, I come for the boobies and asses, and stay for the comments.
*funny AS balls
that’s two…taking a lap
what up, BD?
I think we all know what this is really about – it’s because Jenna doesn’t think Bar Rafeli is the hottest woman on earth. I still remember that video. Everything else is smoke and mirrors. Pres just can’t let it go – banging his fist on a desk “Bar is the hottest Jenna – THE HOTTEST!!!!”
Chilling bro, how are things with you son? waiting on shameonme, said Davie pageviews screwed the blackout designers out of 250k, should be a good story
actually, fuck Jenna, the REAL story is that little asian flamepiece that she rolls with. this chick is OUTRAGEOUS.
http://www.loveinthewildfansmag.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/05/kim-nguyen.jpg
http://starcasm.net/wp-content/uploads/2011/05/Kim-Nguyen-workout-model-mayhem.jpg
livin’ just enough for the city, my man. same soup, just reheated.
not goin to lie i’d plow the bag out of her
shameonme:
so the designers wouldn’t take T-shirts for payment?
Kym is cool, she works at estate if you wanna she her, bartenders there now, use to dance with Jenna there, she was on a show on NBC too, she is mad cool, down to earth, has a BF, seems like a cool dude
Pres you’re a whinny little bitch! You’re jealous of Jenna simply because you’re a fucking slave to BS, you cannot leave or stop writing or sell it because without you the site is doom. So you have to work even harder (foam and blackout tours) to make more money to buy expensive lingerie for Renee only for someone else’s pleasure (you’re being cuckolded) and you hate that Jenna makes more money than you by making videos of her cooch while farting on her rat dog’s face.
“She wows me..as in “Wow, I cant believe that this girl is being propped up by BSS and given her own website” and “Wow, if I dumped a few hundred grand on an education and ended up being a go-go dancer with pink hair whose only claim to fame was a chuckle-worthy youtube video, I’d do a Charles Stewart off the Tobin…” Either show your tits or go away.”
Top notch comment from whoever wrote that on the 2010 article
She is a complete TNUC
By the way- I don’t know how that video shows Jenna is a fraud at all. She didn’t want some other bitch riding her coattails on the site. Pres has Jerry do specific types of blogs too.
wilbur, coulda swore somebody found the link to the video on youtube and dropped in into one of pres’ blogs one random day, but you could be right. either way im almost positive she said she had made the video before working at barstool
I love how someone with the name “reneelovesdp” starts a comment by saying “I know I’m in my 30s”
I’ll never understand why, when she posted that whole page full of statistics to try and prove that ver video went viral because of facebook and not barstool, you didn’t ask “where did you get your internet friends?”
I love how you shitbags write how Barstool is not in the top five sport sites and the Jew is a fucking scumbag, blah, blah, blah….But you keep coming back to this site. Every day. Who’s winning? Fucking fools
Nice essay Ficken, why you so butthurt ?
Every limpdick comment you make is trashing EP or Renee, it’s old, tired and lame………….much like you
how pissed was bostonsbetter2 when the name bostonsbetter was taken?
if pres is really that mad, he should at least man up and say how she fucked him over rather than just beat around her non existent bush and post random rants that no one gives a shit about
I don’t come to barstool for sports news, I come to spew shit on the comment sections, every so often El Pres, Feit, KFC, Big Cat, or Mo write something that makes me laugh. Not Neil though, Neil sucks ass, and the only reason to keep Neil at BS is so we have someone to hate. Real or not, Neil sucks ass.
Kingblackdude, same person idiot. And hopefully now that I have your personal attention let me help you. You may be the biggest shithead on this site. Your self promotion is almost hard to read at times. I actually feel bad for you. Nobody follows your fucking twitter because you are nobody. You are a troll on a blog site. Just stop it already.
bostonsbetter2 , wow two login names bruh, youre a fucking bad ass. Glad you seek my attention , another miserable cunt, youre worst than Tornopen, but i agree with his comment above, 90% of stoolies come for the comment section and yes i am a troll, i enjoy it. when all of the bloggers drop your name in blogs, means youre on a whole different level, just do a search on my name. end of story
PS have 562 twitter followers , let me know when youre going to follow me bro
@ ficken, hate to burst your bubble and give any credit to El Portnose, but Barstool is a very popular site where I live, and that’s almost 5000 miles from the U.S. In fact, if you take the biggest tabloid newspapers from my country, their so-called “goofy” news are taken straight from Barstool and put on their site 1 to 2 days later. Any funny video put on Barstool will appear on their site within two days. Every time. So although this site is a mess and 4 guys keep writing about the same article at the same time (and Neil and Mo should be canned), it’s still popular as hell. Even outside of the U.S.
I haven’t seen or heard about Jenna since whenever she left. She’s succesful? To who, high school chicks? Serious question – who are her followers?
viscous circle…classic
bitch is only worth 500,000 internet dollars anyways
I would totally eat that asshole.
pres just shit his pants and he wan’t even wearing any
I still for the life of me don’t understand how exactly she fucked him over? Was it because she had the video hosted on her own channel vs the barstool channel making herself money vs the shitty paycheck she was getting as a 4th job?
I call that being smart and persevering against the schnoz
Pres, in all honesty I understand why you’re pissed. You feel like you helped her get where she is today and you got no credit for it. Personally, if it were me, I would have thanked you for all you did for me and taken you to dinner or some shit. But to go this far on your end is embarassing. I feel awkward for you. What did you want her to do? Tell the whole world in every interview that BARSTOOL SPORTS, RUN BY DAVID PORTNOY started her “career” (if you can call making pointless videos that cater to the worst of human kind a career? Just let it go. Did you think that by her mentioning Barstool that you’d get more readers? Do you want the same people who watch her videos to be reading your site? Just be thankful she’s out of your life now and you don’t have to hear her voice anymore.
KingBlack, I am cringing reading what you just wrote. I knew you were a douchebag but each time you write shit like that, you drop even further. When 25 year old bloggers drop your name on a blog and you believe you are on a different level, that means you did not get enough attention as a kid and have maybe 3 friends. And when you start dropping twitter followers, please make sure it’s more than 562. Again, you are embarrassing yourself
Well I wouldn’t know if she’s funny because I’ve never watched a video of hers unmuted but I do know every time I get done watching her videos without sound, jizz is to my keyboard what make-up is to her face.
haha what a bitch snit you’ve made Prez! back when Jenna was posting on the Stool it was fun and sexy. Back then it had character. Now you’re like a 15 year old girl crying about how much she stabbed you in the back because she wouldn’t let you stick your big nose up her cooch. Jenna is the best thing that ever happened to BarstoolSports. And now she is gone and you can’t sell advertising, you’ve stooped SO fucking low as to post ads for Adam Sandler’s crappy movies. Fucking embarrassing. And you just want to take credit for starting her career. Guess what, she had tits BEFORE she got to the Stool, Prez!
@donkey show – she didn’t really ‘fuck him over’ – he just sees it as her stabbing him in the back. I think he says in this blog there was no money to be made off of her and she was eventually going to outgrow Barstool. It’s just all about the fact that she can’t be grateful for Pres’s help in promoting her. I can definitely see where he’s coming from. I would be pissed too. But I think he’s taken it a bit far at this point, it’s almost to the point where it’s getting old. She would have to be the one to reach out and apologize though. And if he’s smart, he would accept it and move on with his life and wish her the best.
bostonsbetter2 , youre like the man, do you hi five yourself after you drop your fire comments? SHHHIIIIIT i would if i was you bro
You treated her like a sister? What sort of brother makes his sister dress like a slut to put money in his pockets? You would be on Santa’s naughty list if you believed in Santa.
btw – calling Barstool one of the biggest blogs in the world is laughable.
does anyone else find it bizarre that el prez always harps on what a huge dog guy he is but the only dog he owns is a glorified rat? p.s. KBD just got completely roasted
Nice. A bitter, hatred-fuled rant just in time for Christmas. The truth is that talking into the camera on Youtube is not a sustainable path to fame or fortune. She will be back to showing skin for money and attention before long.
Prez didn’t even want to fuck Jenna, he really wanted to throw one into Kermit. That’s why she left the Stool.
Her YouTube videos prove that all women are retarded. She’s an annoying cunt and not funny in the least bit.
SHE LOOKS LIKE SHES PUTTING ON POUNDAGE!!! must be sippin buckets of high protein
is she talking about that other chick that wrote on the stool. Totally blanking on her name. Emily?
1.) What is the obsession with Michelle Obama? I don’t think she’s ugly, but come on people.
2.) @ficken: I got plenty of bros from the South who read the Stool every day.
3.) I want to fuck Jenna. Hard.
@ilovebarstoolsports: Thank you for the pic of that Asian dimepiece. I will be fapping to that later.
lol im glad there’s one person on this planet that isn’t like “OMG JENNA MARBLES NEW VIDEO IS LIKE SOOOOO FUNNY HAHAHA LOLZZZZ”
she’s only desirable when her mouth is closed, or at least open with no words coming out. pretty sure you find hags like Chelsea Handler on these kinds of lists so they have as much cred as Drake/Wheelchair Jimmy does on the streets of Harlem
don’t worry about it pres, in ten years you’ll have gotten a nose job and bss will still be the best site out there while she will be an old ugly unfunny twat with no job
You know what the shittiest type of commenter is? The ones who come on here day after day, read Pres’ blogs and then trash him, insult Barstool, call him a copycat, and all that bullshit. Get a fucking life people. He makes money off of you assholes coming on here and commenting, so either read the blogs, enjoy them and don’t fucking complain, or just don’t fucking come to the site. None of you would have anything to do besides jerk off to hentai in your mommy’s basement if it wasn’t for this site. Go fucking die.
I went to Umass Amherst saw this bitch up close (standing next to her) at the last BarStool party ever at Amherst. All I gotta say is she is a legit 7. I mean nothing makes a Umass guy get a wood like a quick 7 running around campus, but I mean when she thinks and claims she is a legit 10 makes me piss myself laughing. Caked on makeup chic. She should be nick named plywood for how well her body resembles it.
why does she continue to use the stoollala background for the intro of her videos…
So wait did shameonme get blocked?
I hate barstool more than anything. I only go on to shit on that fag neil and his boyfriend pres. This site is the reason Hitler wanted you guys gone
A dickbag jew getting screwed over by a dumb blonde. I guess karma really is a bitch.
boomhauer, hit the nail on the head. same thought I had when she posted the statistics. She didnt have that reach/fanbase on facebook until she stopped being just a go-go dancer and got involved with Barstool. And tons of people shared that video on facebook AFTER watching it on BSS.
KING—-hahahaha please explain the significance of how many twitter followers someone has?
Viva La View!