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Sleeping In Duel Beds? Yes Please!
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I am so on board with sleeping in different beds it’s not even funny. Like I swear if Aliens were watching us right now the #1 thing they wouldn’t get is why we sleep with somebody else in our bed. It makes NO sense. I’ve been lobbying the First Lady for separate beds for years now. She thinks it makes us look bad. Who fucking cares? There is absolutely no reason for us to be in the same bed. None! It’s not like we can’t fuck if we have two beds. But when I want to go to sleep I don’t want her shit crowding me. I don’t want her pulling covers. I don’t want her getting up. I want peace and quiet. If I want to move to the other side of the bed where the sheets are still cool I should be able to do that. There is nobody on god’s green earth who can convince me that they sleep better with somebody else in bed. Nobody. It just makes no sense not to sleep in separate beds. You can still have sex and a great night’s sleep. I swear this is my mission over the next year. Phase out of this sleeping with your wife bullshit.
Duel beds? Like the kind where they have sword fights, or shoot at one another from 20 paces?
You gotta tighten your shit up Prez.
Did Aaron Burr and Alexander Hamilton have duel beds?
Yes. I’ve had my own bed for over 2 years now and it is the best. On the few occasions that the bitch and I do have sex, I just go back to my room and go sleep while she gets off with a dildo or something.
I don’t care..
I laughed pretty hard at “Duel Beds” that has to be a joke.
Also, yes, I am all for separate beds. Your bed? or mine? grrr-owl. Plus I sweat like a taiwanese boy making Nike’s if there is more that like three pillows in the bed nevermind another person.
Is there another American Jew who fucks up the English language worse than El Learningdisorder? Can’t be.
Just dive in the muff and get the fuck out of dodge…single life bitches
Amen… just make sure you bang in the other persons bed so theres no clean up…. bustin on a face can get messy
But if you get your own bed somewhere else in the condo, do you take your fan with you?
AMEN! My girl is a fucking heater..she is hot as shit in more than one way. She wants to cuddle and I don’t cuddle unless we have sex (then there is the semi-obligation to doing so). She sleeps in the middle of the bed to be closer then she sleeps and elbows me and wakes me up. I am 6’4 and my girl is 5’11, so unless we get a California King size bed, Duel beds will be my next “battle”.
Ireallyhatemywife is the man. Mostly because i can believe he does, in fact, really hate his wife.
I was bitching to my girl that she doesn’t get my nut off frequently enough and she said she doesn’t care if i fuck other girls so long as she doesn’t know them, she doesn’t hear about it, and that i quit bitching about not getting laid enough. Took our relationship to a whole new level.
Now i’m thinking that by getting different rooms and beds i might be able to marry this chick (which is good since we’re engaged)
Just like Frank and Estelle Costanza have separate beds in Seinfeld cus she has the “Jimmy feet”. Listen, my gf likes to lay her head on my chest when she sleeps and wraps her arms around me and I hate cus if I move she begins fucking talking in her sleep, if I had a choice I would go sleep on fucking couch she has in her room but I hate to hear the bitching happen. I’m yes on duel beds.
You’re 100% correct El Pres!
Hank – Girl who says she doesn’t mind if you bang other chicks is already banging someone else. Probably one of your buddies.
No way this dude went to Michigan
all about the “duel” bed scene….my girl claims she sleeps better with me in bed, dlearly she is insane…that said I gotta believe it will affect the sex life, b/c even though most guys would be cool with it the chicks would eventually use it against us and not put out
I cant believe I watched this for that long, but why doesnt it surprise me that the married Jonas brother sleeps in a different bed than his wife??? This has nothing to do with snoring or wanting to be comfortable. This is strictly he doesnt like girls. And if he does, then he likes girls that are sub 14.
Hank, I second the Viking. Your Bitch is DEFINITELY fucking someone else (Which sucks, cause you’re engaged). Probably taking ropes to the face.
Hank…you might have the AIDS. Go get yourself checked. Your girl sounds dirty. Guaranteed when she’s banging other guys she’s not using a condom. She probably loves getting creampied as well. Get out while you can.
One word Hank. Herpigonnosyphlaids.
giving up the same-bed system will dramatically decrease the success rate of morning sex, for those of you who are fortunate enough to have girlfriends who are as horny as you and too tired to resist, as i am when my boyfriend starts groping me in the morning.
Hank, I’m with you. She cares about you having sex with other girls, just not enough to put out enough to stop it. That’s why this marriage shit is for the birds you are with a girl long enough and you’ll start getting sex like a dog gets treats.
I’m fine with the same bed, just don’t fucking lie on me.
I’m sick and tired of waking up and finding out she’s crawled partway onto me, causing some limb of mine to fall asleep.
Not a bad idea really. The wet spot can be in a different bed. Seriously, I like her in my bed, it just feels right. If it doesn’t for ya, there are issues.
Gotta agree with Viking on this. When you do find out you won’t have a leg to stand on either. Nothing is worse than that moment during an argument when you realize that you are wrong.
Stupid idea. Honestly why wouldn’t you want a chick sleeping with you. Id throw away the cold side of a bed for a chick.
poor hank,
dude probably thought he had the perfect situation, when really all he has is a whore of a fiancee and chunky discharge comin out his dickhole soon. cant win em all bros
I will say this, I need variety in my life, and i prefer the dynamic of this open relationship to before, where i felt tethered.
Fact is, i guess i don’t even really care if my girl is banging other guys as long as i get enough sex in my life and i get to fuck other girls. My girl and i have been involved in some threesomes and there is honestly is a good a a chance she would be “cheating” on me with a woman as a guy. Yes, she is bi.
All in all i’m not too worried about it.
I have tried to get my wife in another bed, espeilly when its hot as balls, she almost agreed to it until I told her I wanted her bed in the kitchen
Dual beds is a great idea….better night sleep for all and dropping the nut on her bed means no mess, no muss no fuss for the kid.
I’m on board
I sleep-punch and kick like a motherfucker … straight up black and blue marks all over my chicks shins and she caught a nice elbow to the jaw recently, so she has been pushing for separate beds. More room for me to flail undisturbed sounds pretty good to me.