Colorado - A former teacher and girls basketball coach at a Fort Collins high school is serving a 30-day jail sentence after she admitted to providing two male students with alcohol last spring. Amber Huber, 30, of Loveland, a former physical education teacher at Poudre High School, began serving her jail sentence on Jan. 4 after she pleaded guilty to felony contributing to the delinquency of a minor. …Huber admitted she provided two 17-year-old male students with alcohol in April. The affidavit indicates Huber drove the boys to Horsetooth Reservoir on a Friday night to drink a bottle of Patron tequila and then took the boys to a McDonald’s before returning them to their car at about 1:30 a.m…

The affidavit reports that cell phone records provided the following exchange Huber had with one of the boys the day they went drinking at Horsetooth Reservoir:

Ms. Huber: K u want some hard liquor?

(Boy): You get the liq you want :-) ”

In other messages sent to one of the boys two days after the drinking incident Huber said, “I can’t. I talked to (the other boy) about it yesterday. I can’t chill with u guys anymore. We can all only be friends and that is it. It creates a tempting situation when we chill so we probably shouldn’t chill anymore… Just the fact that I am married and we can’t be putting ourselves in tempting situations. Obviously drinking alcohol and chillin together is not the smartest decision. I can’t be lying to my husband cause if I keep doing what I am doing then my marriage is going to be over. I just need to play it safe. Make sense?”

What a great Sex Scandal Teacher sto– Wait.  What?  There was no sex?  None at all?  These kids get Amber to buy them Patron, do shots with them up at Horsetooth and then they can’t seal the deal?  These have got to be the two most hapless, pathetic 17 year old boys in America.  Or their the ugliest bastards in existence.  How else can you explain Ms. Huber suddenly finding religion in crunch time.  I mean, just look at her.  She’s got “I want to Sportfuck two of my students out by the reservoir” written all over her face.  If it were any other kids, she’d already be on parole from her statutory rape conviction and making babies with one or both of them.   These kids might as well just join the army or something to get out of town, because they’ll never live down the shame of striking out with a teacher.  I guess this proves the old adage: You can lead a teacher to tequila, but you can’t make her eat the worm.

(Thanks to Matt B.)