The Revenge of Blackberry!
So today was a huge day for Blackberry and America in general. After months of anticipation and speculation Blackberry finally released the Q10 and Z10 blackberries. Well the reviews are in and they are glorious.
“I kind of broke up with you for something that had a little more bling,” she said. “Now we’re exclusively dating again and I’m very happy.”
Alicia Keys
“The absolute best typing experience in the industry, period.”
Thorsten Heins (BlackBerry CEO)
It’s lovely, fast and efficient, bristling with fresh, useful ideas. And here’s the shocker — it’s complete. The iPhone, Android and Windows Phone all entered life missing important features. Not this one.
David Pogue, New York Times
And on and on it goes. Analysts from coast to coast are hailing the new Blackberry as the best cell phone device every invented. Already proclaiming the Iphone to be antiquated, prehistoric and an embarrassment to those who still use it. Now a lesser man would gloat right now. Say that I told you so. That I told you Iphones were just a phase for easily impressed teenage girls who like instagram and fancy ringtones. That Blackberries would always be for cracking skulls and making mogul moves. That if you wanted to be taken seriously in the boardroom you needed a blackberry. But like I said I’ll be the bigger man and just leave it at this. I bet that dead mothefucker Steve Jobs is rolling around in his grave right now and I’m loving every second of it.
DingleBerry
Didn’t donkey dicks all over the world say they stuck with blackberry due to the keyboard?
Enjoy having like 0 apps.
That picture with the lights looks like the episode of The Office where they’re trying to sell the Pyramid.
Apple doesn’t need Iphone in order to keep its’ company afloat, RIM does.
Enjoy that for three months. RIM will be out of business before the end of Q2 this year.
So, of your quotes, one is the CEO of the company that makes the product, one works in an industry being destroyed by the technology he’s reviewing, and the last is a chick who is on fire. Call me unconvinced.
go look at what happened to their stock today after they announced this garbage
@DaBurd “Enjoy having like 0 apps” has to be the gayest statement of all time. Are you a 13 year old chick who’s just starting to grow some grass on the field?
You try and flip out because we make fun of your ugly, horse faced, whore of a wife and then go and shit on a dead guy? Get the fuck outta here Portnoy
Wait the newest phone has the newest most advanced features? You’ve got to be kidding?!
This will likely catch on as well as the new Myspace did, shitdick.
It would be a big day for America, If RIM wasn’t a Canadian company
Only faggots like u are happy…. Now onto sum breaking news Ray lewis had sex with the deer then took the extract from its antlers…. Developing….
RIM has changed its name to blackberry
has 70,000 apps now and getting more, most popular ones are there now
faster web broswer than ios and android, bench testing proved it
fucking stoolies are so fucking smart bro
you just want bbm so you can text your other jewish friends for free
Schmuck.
I bet it doesnt even have Tinder. Automatic FAIL
Getting a blackberry is like missionary with a older fat chick when you’re not even really drunk and getting caught by your buddies. First you convince yourself that she’s not that bad. Then it’s at least a year of nonstop regret.
Does the new Blackberry work without having to take the battery out and wait 20 minutes for it to reboot after the phone freezes? That would be great.
Is BrickBreaker 2 on it is the real question.
Jeff Sharon, STFU
Look at all the equity analysts we have here at Barstool! Also definitely the first comment thread i’ve read lately that doesn’t have a comment about the first lady. “I took Renee (from behind) seriously in the boardroom” or “Renee is rolling around on my balls”
If i cant download pingup i aint gettin the phone.
Cant stand apple products because of the consumer. When they come into my job sit at a table and look important with their iPad, iPhone, Macbook (usually all 3) out at the same time and then claim poverty and can hardly leave a tip. hate those people.
is that the best you can do commentors? Have fun with 0 apps? good one dude
they couldn’t have picked a more washed up fraud on the planet to support their product than Alicia Keys. Guarantee she has an iPhone but got paid a shit load of money for that quote. iPhone>any other device.
does it have an app where you can just erase all of the mo and neil blogs off of barstool?
100 million users, tightjeans. Stay out of the big kid discussions.
RIM/Blackberry delaying the inevitable. “People should know when they are conquered.”
Pageviews, coming in warm.
You don’t have the right to refer to yourself as a mogul pres. Moguls don’t to bitchwork around the house
Their stock fucking TANKED today. This announcement was pathetic.
Also, Apple will truly go back to the hipsters again because Android and blackberry are going to blow iOS out of the water. They are going to be left with just their app selection and google is catching up really fucking quick in that department. Apple got too cocky.
1. every company stocks goes down when they announce a new product, look it up you stupid fucks
2. blackberry is back bitches!
3. they are going to have a sick superbowl, wait BIG GAME commercial
@dustman So what can a Blackberry do that an iPhone or a Droid or a Galaxy can’t? Enlighten me.
IPhone and blackberry? The Samsung galaxy s3 literally blows both out of the water
One thing I don’t get about RIM, is why they aren’t marketing their one advantage over the other phones, their security! But maybe they are in the business world, I just don’t see it.
If this is anything like your sports predictions, I’m going to short RIM stock with every dime I have.
have you seen the design? Basically identical to the iPhone 5. Haha stole a page right out of the Apple playbook. Fucking amateurs over at RIM job
3 major things, cantgetthestinkout
ps using google is free
http://www.webpronews.com/check-out-all-the-new-features-in-blackberry-10-2013-01
@haterade1 apps are a pretty important aspect of having a smartphone. If you just need to call, text and email then you would just keep using the shitty old blackberry.
Have fun without Tinder on your dumbass Blackberry
Why didn’t they get a quote from Pageviews? He’s the only mogul who still uses a Blackberry.
Where do people get this idea that apple was the first company to come up with every idea that has ever been had? holy shit you people are brainwashed. they are a great company but here is something… you can get a computer with the same specs for 600 or 1700… which are you going to get? hint… the 1700 one is a macbook.
Galaxy s3 wipes fucking fat person asshole with blackberrys and iphones
@thelastchance, blackberry just hired Alicia Keys as their creative director or some shit…so the quotes he chose are even less impressive.
@KingBlackDude It has a calendar that keeps track of your events?!?!? The fact that they even included that in their press release pretty much says it all about how far RIM has fallen. But hey, if you want to open two apps at once and if you need to erase company information after getting shitcanned because you suck then knock yourself out.
-
PS- “using google is free” -So are your food stamps.
Maybe you might get Angry Birds by 2020
The stock “tanked”. It went down 12% after going up over 300% in like 2 months. SO shut the fuck up, you have NO idea what you are talking about. It’s still a good buy too, cause like pres said, every single industry analyst is loving the shit out of this thing. It’ll hit 20 by the time march madness starts.
I’m not sayign shit abotu the phone itself, cause bragging about whose phone is cooler or talking about which phone has better features coudl be the gayest thing of modern america. I guess you all call it a “pussification”?
If you don’t have an iPhone, you’re dumb. End of story.
Is my prepaid tracfone cool, guys?
what the fuck kind of credibility does alicia keys have
Whyalwaysme, congratulations on not knowing a fucking thing about stocks. Kill yourself. Lot of faggots that really love blackberry around here.
-12% and counting..
Doesn’t even have Google Maps. Think these idiots would have learned SOMETHING from the last Iphone. Idiots
by bluehenbl “100 million users, tightjeans. Stay out of the big kid discussions.”
blue, MySpace had 100 million users also. That doesn’t mean shit. Consistent negative earnings growth over the past dozens quarter, slashing of their marketing & advertising budgets, slashing of their workforce by 5,000, and putting all of your eggs in one basket. Those are all good things, correct? They are setting themselves up to sell their OS and/or sell off all components of their companiy. And when you are scrimping and scratching it out with the MSFT machine for a distant 3rd in the mobile devices market, prospects aren’t looking to good.
dudebro, my personal trading account would beg to differ with you. But,even if I didn’t know a thing and you disagreed with me, kill myself? seriously? you should be less angry. Go get laid.
haha “my personal trading account would beg to differ” holy shit you are a bitch.
yup. You nailed it. Cause I’m the one being a tough guy on a messaging board.
whyalwaysme Jesus you fucking whine too much bro. Reading your whining gave me cancer.
Whyalwaysmw, I bet you drive a dodge stratus.
Given that you run this site off a Commodore 64, its no surprise you are a blackberry fan
1. I like my blackberry
2. I am short roughly 250,000 shares
3. PAYDAY!!
Sell on the news, kids.
Iphone just a phase huh? The most popular cellphone ever that single-handedly revolutionized the phone and technology industries is second to blackberry? The same blackberry who is scrambling to stay alive while apple makes BILLIONS? I can no longer take you seriously.
Minister you are literally the exact type of person that makes people hate apple.
I have an iPhone 5, but anyone that gets fired up arguing which phone is most superior is a total fa’afafine
I doubt anyone cares
Hey now, Did you just put a blackberry in the middle of the Howard Stern logo?? Shame on you
if this phone was so fucking cool, why doesn’t LeBron use it?
“That dead motherfucker Steve Jobs” – yup, you got ‘em good there Prez… straight roasted
Blackberry is a filthy Jew phone Jew. Jew Jew Jew Jew
http://www.boston.com/business/technology/2013/01/30/new-blackberry-may-help-reverse-slide-smart-phone-sales/mylOwHNM7EgSoYeCd4vPQM/story.html
100% percent agree. i’m still rocking my Bold until the glorious BB10 is released.